Recent Posts

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91
Outpourings / Re: Introduction
« Last post by Tarquin Thunderthighs lll on August 07, 2020, 07:16:51 PM »
Quote from: Mince on August 05, 2020, 08:25:57 AM
Welcome to the board.
Five minutes here, and you're on the Board already? You'll be Chairperson by the end of the week, at this rate. Welcome!
92
Outpourings / Re: Languages.
« Last post by Mince on August 07, 2020, 12:52:29 PM »
The only languages I know are computer languages.

I might learn to speak Scottish one day.
93
Outpourings / Re: Languages.
« Last post by Diane CBPFC on August 06, 2020, 10:44:19 PM »

I feel proud that I can listen to Irish, Scottish, Liverpudlian etc stand-up comedians without having to put the CC on, my family thinks they are speaking a different language. 

94
Outpourings / Languages.
« Last post by Roger Kettle on August 06, 2020, 10:11:23 PM »
Are any of you comfortable speaking a foreign language? I've always been ashamed that I did little to develop the stuff I learned at school. (I studied French, German and Russian). I also had a French grandmother and a father who was completely bi-lingual with a near-perfect knowledge of Spanish thrown in. I guess that, if I'd practised the languages, I would have been more fluent but laziness took over. It would take me a long time in the company of French and German speakers to get back to anything like the level I used to have at school. (My Russian was always horrendous). It embarrasses me that I've been visiting Portugal for more than 15 years and all that I can manage is the odd "obrigado". Shameful.
For some reason, I know that the Sioux for beer is "M'nee-bee-gah". Extremely useful.
Anyway, back to my original question--are any of you comfortable speaking a foreign language?
95
Outpourings / Re: Dad jokes: punchline needed
« Last post by Mince on August 05, 2020, 05:06:42 PM »
Quote from: Diane CBPFC on August 05, 2020, 04:07:40 PM
2. I caught my son chewing on electrical cords. Bright lad.

That's good. But it's not the line I have.


Quote from: Diane CBPFC on August 05, 2020, 04:07:40 PM
3. I was going to tell a time-travelling joke. But I already did that tomorrow.

That's actually better than my one: But you guys didn't like it.


Quote from: Diane CBPFC on August 05, 2020, 04:07:40 PM
4. During my first month on the road-paving crew, they gave me all the worst jobs. I endured all of it, up until they put me on paint duty. That crossed a line.

Again nice. But the one I have is better.


Quote from: Diane CBPFC on August 05, 2020, 04:07:40 PM
5. Somebody wrote a quote at the bottom of the swimming pool. But it was too deep for me.

Spot on!


Quote from: Diane CBPFC on August 05, 2020, 04:07:40 PM
10. What do you call an old snowman? A puddle.

I have: Water. Yours is better.
96
Outpourings / Re: Introduction
« Last post by Roger Kettle on August 05, 2020, 04:18:47 PM »
And a welcome from me, Outasite. Find a comfy chair and join in.
97
Outpourings / Re: Introduction
« Last post by Diane CBPFC on August 05, 2020, 04:10:09 PM »
Welcome Outasite - thank goodness you don't read with your breakfast porridge.
98
Outpourings / Re: The pub.
« Last post by Diane CBPFC on August 05, 2020, 04:08:34 PM »
Quote from: Max on August 02, 2020, 08:11:53 PM
Diane, keep schtum about the poppies, these are mine.  :)




  (y)
99
Outpourings / Re: Dad jokes: punchline needed
« Last post by Diane CBPFC on August 05, 2020, 04:07:40 PM »
Quote from: Mince on August 05, 2020, 08:52:05 AM
Can you give the punchline for each of these dad jokes?

1. Two melons have a forbidden love. They try to run away together many times, but are caught every time.

2. I caught my son chewing on electrical cords. Bright lad.

3. I was going to tell a time-travelling joke. But I already did that tomorrow.

4. During my first month on the road-paving crew, they gave me all the worst jobs. I endured all of it, up until they put me on paint duty. That crossed a line.

5. Somebody wrote a quote at the bottom of the swimming pool. But it was too deep for me.

6. What’s the difference between a good burger and a shooting star?

7. I'm telling dad jokes.

8. What do you call a magician who has lost his magic?

9. Why are koalas not officially recognised as bears?

10. What do you call an old snowman? A puddle.

That's all from me for now.
100
Outpourings / Dad jokes: punchline needed
« Last post by Mince on August 05, 2020, 08:52:05 AM »
Can you give the punchline for each of these dad jokes?

1. Two melons have a forbidden love. They try to run away together many times, but are caught every time.

2. I caught my son chewing on electrical cords.

3. I was going to tell a time-travelling joke.

4. During my first month on the road-paving crew, they gave me all the worst jobs. I endured all of it, up until they put me on paint duty.

5. Somebody wrote a quote at the bottom of the swimming pool.

6. What’s the difference between a good burger and a shooting star?

7. I'm telling dad jokes.

8. What do you call a magician who has lost his magic?

9. Why are koalas not officially recognised as bears?

10. What do you call an old snowman?
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