Beau Peep Notice Board
Beau Peep Notice Board => Outpourings => Topic started by: The Peepmaster on November 16, 2008, 10:37:41 AM
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Write your own speech-bubbles for this Horace strip from yesteryear.
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(http://i202.photobucket.com/albums/aa202/sketch1959/horace%20comp.jpg) (http://s202.photobucket.com/user/sketch1959/media/horace%20comp.jpg.html)
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Frame 1: "This is the evil swine..."
Frame 2: "I'm reporting you to the sheriff, for cutting the heads and arms off your customers. I appreciate that they are still able to move around, as indeed is the one standing by you, just to your right, (my left). Several are in the shop window, frantically trying to get out. As they no longer have eyes, they are unable to see the futility of their efforts."
Frame 3: "I AM the sheriff!"
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Frame 1. This must have been where we went after drinking last night Dennis.
Frame 2. We were blind drunk and you sold us these poncy western outfits!
Frame 3. You should thank me legionnaires, you both asked for "saloon girl" dresses.
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(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v67/BritTeacher/Beau%20Peep/231bd694.jpg)
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(http://i178.photobucket.com/albums/w267/aquatom_2007/Horacecomp1-2.jpg)
(http://i178.photobucket.com/albums/w267/aquatom_2007/horacecomp21-2.jpg)
(http://i178.photobucket.com/albums/w267/aquatom_2007/horacecomp5-2.jpg)
(http://i178.photobucket.com/albums/w267/aquatom_2007/horacecomp2-2.jpg)
(http://i178.photobucket.com/albums/w267/aquatom_2007/horacecomp3-2.jpg)
(http://i178.photobucket.com/albums/w267/aquatom_2007/horacecomp41-2.jpg)
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Wow! I've got into that story! Keep going, Tom. I want to know how it ends.
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Cool Tom - that was a whole story.
Mince I can't see yours.
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Some good stuff so far. I'll let it run till the end of the month.
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(http://malcmcgookin.files.wordpress.com/2008/11/horace-12.jpg)
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(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v67/BritTeacher/Beau%20Peep/eb698531.jpg)
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And he wonders why he's Johnny No-mates. ..0
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1 Oh look a dress
2 Can I have a new dress
3 Yes I am sure Roger can send the prize to your new Address.
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Does Roger know Horace's address?
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he should do he writes the words
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I think he sends him Christmas cards.
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(http://i38.tinypic.com/2mhhspf.jpg)
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(http://www.beaupeep.com/horacecompetitionstrip.jpg)
Frame 1: "When I asked that shopkeeper if he served Mince, he said "Does this look like a butchers?". I'll try again."
Frame 2: "Do you serve Mince when he comes in to buy his frocks."
Frame 3: "No - I normally leave that to the assistant who looks after his frilly girls' panties requirements."
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Frame 1: "I ordered a new outfit here for my karaoke turn."
Frame 2: "Has the order for "The Lord of the Isles" arrived yet?"
Frame 3: "Sir has already been informed that we neither stock nor source crotchless items."
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Frame 1: I'll go pick up my costume for the fancy dress party.
Frame 2: Has my Custer's last stand outfit arrived?
Frame 3:Yes Sir, that'll be the blonde wig, buckskin jacket and dark brown trousers?
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Frame 1: "Florrie - this joke's gone too far"
Frame 2: "Hi, I'm Andy Capp. I urgently need to have a word with this cartoon's artist"
Frame 3: "You think you've got problems. I'm Fred Flintstone."
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Frame 1: "Won't be long."
Frame 2: "Bartender, gimme a whisky!"
Frame 3: "You're trying to get me to say 'Should've gone to Specsavers', aren't you?"
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I used to wonder why more people didn't write cartoons. Now I know.
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With those encouraging words, I`ve decided to have another go ? even though it is Horrace.
1. Let`s see what the western wear shop has for sale!
2. What do you have for sale?
3. Dresses. Western dresses.
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The above joke was in homage to 007.
Now for another try.
1. I bet this is a good place to pick up babes Mojo!
2. Do you sell to beauties?
3. Yes, gorgeous.
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The above joke was in homage to 007.
Now for another try.
1. I bet this is a good place to pick up babes Tonto.
2. Do you sell to beauties
3. Yes, gorgeous.
It took two readings but ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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I used to wonder why more people didn't write cartoons. Now I know.
We'll remember that next time you come asking us "Is this funny?", McGookin.
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1.WELL IF YOU DON'T KNOW I WILL ASK THE STOREMAN
2. WHICH OF THESE DRESSES WILL SUIT ME BEST
3. NEITHER. BUT I LIKE YOUR SENSE OF HUMOUR
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The above joke was in homage to 007.
Now for another try.
1. I bet this is a good place to pick up babes Tonto.
2. Do you sell to beauties
3. Yes, gorgeous.
It took two readings but ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Well, I still don't get it after ten readings. It's too subtle for me. I think I'll stick to Roger's humour.
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POINT OF ORDER!
Tarquin's first entry, and indeed the girl himself, should be disqualified from the competition. He has changed the artwork of the strip to suit his purposes.
I expect this to be dealt with swiftly and firmly by Roger himself.
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POINT OF ORDER!
Tarquin's first entry, and indeed the girl himself, should be disqualified from the competition. He has changed the artwork of the strip to suit his purposes.
I expect this to be dealt with swiftly and firmly by Roger himself.
Took you long enough to bleedin' notice - I think you should be disqualified for that. Call yourself a moderator?
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Frame 1: "Sorry for talking down to you, Mojo old mate."
Frame 2: "It's time to speak up for myself."
Frame 3: "My dog's taking minutes."
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POINT OF ORDER!
Tarquin's first entry, and indeed the girl himself, should be disqualified from the competition. He has changed the artwork of the strip to suit his purposes.
I expect this to be dealt with swiftly and firmly by Roger himself.
Goodness me! I see that a certain Mince has elected to use that same altered artwork for his own weak efforts, whereas others have done the decent thing and utilised the original.
I am prepared to forgive Tarquin, for he is a true artist, striving to push the boundaries of his medium, ever mindful that his admirers expect nothing less. Mince is a cockle's bum-smell.
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1: I know, I'll buy Kitty a dress for Christmas
2: I'd like to buy a dress please.
3: Certainly. Does Sir wear his holster to the left or to the right?
;)
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Goodness me! I see that a certain Mince has elected to use that same altered artwork for his own weak efforts, whereas others have done the decent thing and utilised the original.
I am prepared to forgive Tarquin, for he is a true artist, striving to push the boundaries of his medium, ever mindful that his admirers expect nothing less. Mince is a cockle's bum-smell.
What is this? All girls together?
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Have I won yet?
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1: I know, I'll buy Kitty a dress for Christmas
2: I'd like to buy a dress please.
3: Certainly. Does Sir wear his holster to the left or to the right?
;)
Top drawer.
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1: I know, I'll buy Kitty a dress for Christmas
2: I'd like to buy a dress please.
3: Certainly. Does Sir wear his holster to the left or to the right?
;)
Top drawer.
I agree.
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Bullshit, you two are in cahoots to stop me winning.
"Does sir wear his holster to the left or right"? What's funny about that? And yes, I get it, I used to work in Hepworths.
Roger, hurry up and award me the prize.
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My final decision will be bought...er...made at the end of the month.
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Would you like me to judge it, oh great one?
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Would you like me to judge it, oh great one?
No, I think Roger should.
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Would you like me to judge it, oh great one?
No, I think Roger should.
I said "oh geat one", not "pollock-brain". ..0
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That would be great, Peeps. I think Tarks did it last year and I'm more than happy to pass the buck again.
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Robs won it this year
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That would be great, Peeps. I think Tarks did it last year and I'm more than happy to pass the buck again.
It's not really going to look fair, me awarding it to myself though, Roger... :-\
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That would be great, Peeps. I think Tarks did it last year and I'm more than happy to pass the buck again.
It's not really going to look fair, me awarding it to myself though, Roger... :-\
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POINT OF ORDER!
1: I know, I'll buy Kitty a dress for Christmas
2: I'd like to buy a dress please.
3: Certainly. Does Sir wear his holster to the left or to the right?
;)
Top drawer.
I agree.
Stop it . I confess. I'm a cheeting git too. Turn back about 17 pages from the back of Horace Book 2.
Sorry :-[
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No wonder it was the best - Kettle wrote it!
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Crikey - and I was about to agree with Malc. :-[
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I WIN THE COMPETITION!!!
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Thread closed :\
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Typical!
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Thread closed again! ..0
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You do know that admins can post in locked topics.
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Yes, but only those with the intellect of lugworm would continue to contribute. (Me aside).
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Yes, but only those with the intellect of lugworm would continue to contribute. (Me aside).
I was about to say you're not that intelligent.
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Stop posting in closed threads! You're just showing yourself up. ..0
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Thread re-opened... ..0
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I must admit I voted the Rob/Kettle entry second against a very strong winner, namely me.
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1. I wonder why the women have no heads.
2. Tell me why your models have no heads
3. So they don't have to talk to headless chickens like you
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Are you talkin' to me?
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...because you're not looking at me.
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;D
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Another entry which I don't expect to win ;D
(notice the sign)
(http://i34.tinypic.com/2mhwq4y.jpg)
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;D
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Another entry which I don't expect to win ;D
(notice the sign)
(http://i34.tinypic.com/2mhwq4y.jpg)
I laughed out loud, but it needs a slight tweaking, (if you don't mind listening to the advice of an expert).
The change to the sign isn't really needed - the strip works fine anyway, except that it would be more appropriate if he said "Hi, I'm looking for a big girls blouse". And then the shopkeeper responded with "I'm sorry, Sir. Mince has already left."
The reference to a second person deflects a little from the humour, in my opinion.
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Another entry which I don't expect to win ;D
(notice the sign)
(http://i34.tinypic.com/2mhwq4y.jpg)
I laughed out loud, but it needs a slight tweaking, (if you don't mind listening to the advice of an expert).
The change to the sign isn't really needed - the strip works fine anyway, except that it would be more appropriate if he said "Hi, I'm looking for a big girls blouse". And then the shopkeeper responded with "I'm sorry, Sir. Mince has already left."
The reference to a second person deflects a little from the humour, in my opinion.
Sorry Boss :'(
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Having said that, it is one of the major contenders for the prize! ;)
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Having said that, it is one of the major contenders for the prize! ;)
Well that's cheered me up a wee bit after the Celtic result. :(
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I'm hoping Mince will come and explain how Celtic managed to lose that one. The O.G. was especially unfortunate, considering he'd been one of the better players overall.
Oh, that reminds me. I need to go and have a look at how my belov?d Wolves got on tonight...
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Well, I have to admit I only skimmed through the rest of them, but Colin's was the one that made me laugh out loud. Not that I'm trying to influence the judge(s). Just giving my reaction. I wouldn't even attempt to do one myself - well done to all those "amateurs" who have. :)
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Colin's is my new choice for second place. ..0
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I did like Colin's. It's definitely between Colin and someone beginning with "M".
(Although a part of Me feels it shouldn't)
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Look, if it's just a case of sticking Peepmaster and Mince into the punchline, why didn't you say so?
Panel 1: This looks like the place.
Panel 2: I'm looking for a pair of chaps that don't irritate.
Panel 3: Well that counts out Peepmaster and Mince.
Boom tish.
Right. By my reckoning, I'm now running first AND second.
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I think two of mine were brilliant - it was too bad that only Vulture understands me.
I say next year have Vulture judge the competition.
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That's very good too. I'm a little uncomfortable being in the same frame as Mince...
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I'm with Malc on this. Sorry, Colin - it was good, but it was a cheap laugh at easy targets, that would be completely over the heads of anyone other than the hardcore members of this forum...just like Malc's most recent effort.
Mine, on the other hand..........
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I'm with Malc on this. Sorry, Colin - it was good, but it was a cheap laugh at easy targets, that would be completely over the heads of anyone other than the hardcore members of this forum...just like Malc's most recent effort.
Mine, on the other hand..........
Hang on. I've forgotten what your entry was; remind me.
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Knock, knock..... ..0
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Knock, knock..... ..0
..... who's there?
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..0
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Knock, knock..... ..0
..... who's there?
"Minnie"
"Minnie who?"
"Mini-brained Mince, the haddock-head".
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I do like the dresses.
Can I try the dress on.
And your bust size is?
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I don't believe it. The Fishmongers Society has phoned me yet again to complain. This time about the haddock-head reference. They've insisted that I apologise.
To all you haddock out there, I am truly sorry for the insult.
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Okay, Peeps--who wins?
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(http://i34.tinypic.com/2mhwq4y.jpg)
It's this one, Roger. I really liked so many of the other entries, which were all very clever. Even the one by Mince had its plus-points.
I realise that Colin, by altering the sign, had technically altered the drawing, (like Tarquin Thunderthighs III did), but that didn't detract from the joke, and it still worked without the defacement. It was simply a yellow-card offence at most. He was still "in the game", so to speak. It's a true artist that transcends boundaries and challenges convention. Anyway, back to Colin, I felt his effort had but one challenger, and that was Rob. Since Rob admitted he's just copied something that Roger had created in the past, I had to rule that out too. In the end, Colin won because he deserved to. Well done Colin.
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Congratulations Colin - yours was very funny.
And Peepmaster I must say that I admire you for picking a bloke to win the competition that made a his joke about you. You sir, are a gentleman.
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Congratulations Colin - yours was very funny.
And Peepmaster I must say that I admire you for picking a bloke to win the competition that made a his joke about you. You sir, are a gentleman.
I wouldn't go this far, Diane.....!
Congratulations, Colin. Well deserved! What's the prize again?
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Congratulations Colin - yours was very funny.
And Peepmaster I must say that I admire you for picking a bloke to win the competition that made a his joke about you. You sir, are a gentleman.
I wouldn't go this far, Diane.....!
Congratulations, Colin. Well deserved! What's the prize again?
A night out with Mince.
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Thanks Peepmaster, it's nice to see that you do indeed have a genuine eye for talent. ;D
Thanks everyone for putting up a great fight.
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Colin, I probably have your address somewhere but could you remind me at
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Roger - I'd have PM'd him, (or YM, ICQ, Skype etc.,)
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Jolly good show, Colin. Let's hope your acceptance speech is a little more brief than Peepsie's judge's summary. ..0
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Ah - I see that it was. Spot on!
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Roger - I'd have PM'd him, (or YM, ICQ, Skype etc.,)
Er...yes...quite right.
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Tarks, I couldn't be arsed to write spiels of dross like some people ..0 I thought my announcement encapsulated everything nicely, anyway. ..0
Roger - you stand the risk of getting all kinds of loonies, spam and naked ladies filling your in-box if you post your email address on here. remember the adage:
A PM is wise
And keeps nutters at bay
Especially on Wednesdays.
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What?!!!! Colin won?!!!!
Oh, come on, what is this rubbish?
Firstly, and I know this is difficult for someone like Peepmaster who can't count, I had two entries, not the paltry one that Colin made.
Secondly, Colin insulted two people in his cartoon, but I managed THREE. Again, this must be down to the numerically challenged Peepmaster.
Thirdly, mine was better anyway.
Fourthly, I should have won.
I'm not playing this Christmas competition any more if I'm not going to win every time.
The above is my entry for the 2009 "Malc McGookin didn't win!" Whinging Post Competition
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What?!!!! Colin won?!!!!
Oh, come on, what is this rubbish?
Firstly, and I know this is difficult for someone like Peepmaster who can't count, I had two entries, not the paltry one that Colin made.
Secondly, Colin insulted two people in his cartoon, but I managed THREE. Again, this must be down to the numerically challenged Peepmaster.
Thirdly, mine was better anyway.
Fourthly, I should have won.
I'm not playing this Christmas competition any more if I'm not going to win every time.
The above is my entry for the 2009 "Malc McGookin didn't win!" Whinging Post Competition
I actually had 2 entries.
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Colin, I probably have your address somewhere but could you remind me at r.kettle@talk21.com
It's on it's way Roger ;D
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I actually had 2 entries.
Call that other one an entry?!
The above is an addition to my entry for the 2009 "Malc McGookin didn't win!" Whinging Post Competition
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I actually had 2 entries.
Call that other one an entry?!
The above is an addition to my entry for the 2009 "Malc McGookin didn't win!" Whinging Post Competition
I won and you didn't so
(http://www.cosgan.de/images/more/bigs/g150.gif)
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That's what I love about this place - where else would you get such dignity in defeat and grace in victory?
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Two little boys.......?
I heard that befor is this known as da ja vue?
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I think we should have a minute's silence for Mince's dearly-departed brain-cell.
Roger - I love your new avatar. I was always a fan of Charlie Drake.
I've also removed your email address from that earlier post, now that Colin's contacted you. You don't want loonies contacting you.
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I thought that his new avatar was Colonel Boogie.
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I think we should have a minute's silence for Mince's dearly-departed brain-cell.
Roger - I love your new avatar. I was always a fan of Charlie Drake.
I've also removed your email address from that earlier post, now that Colin's contacted you. You don't want loonies contacting you.
What if sensible people like me should want to contact him?
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well done Colin i knew i could not win this year it was a cracker though.
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I think we should have a minute's silence for Mince's dearly-departed brain-cell.
Roger - I love your new avatar. I was always a fan of Charlie Drake.
I've also removed your email address from that earlier post, now that Colin's contacted you. You don't want loonies contacting you.
What if sensible people like me should want to contact him?
Diane, I'm pretty sure you've got my email address, my home address AND my phone number!
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I think we should have a minute's silence for Mince's dearly-departed brain-cell.
Roger - I love your new avatar. I was always a fan of Charlie Drake.
I've also removed your email address from that earlier post, now that Colin's contacted you. You don't want loonies contacting you.
Thanks, Nige. I thought YOU were responsible for my nifty new avatar! Ah, well, whoever it was, I thank you.
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She's probably forgotten your inside-leg measurement though, Roger.
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Roger, did you receive my email?
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Yep---and I replied, saying that I'd send off your prize in the next day or two, Colin. Strange you didn't receive it.
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I think we should have a minute's silence for Mince's dearly-departed brain-cell.
Roger - I love your new avatar. I was always a fan of Charlie Drake.
I've also removed your email address from that earlier post, now that Colin's contacted you. You don't want loonies contacting you.
What if sensible people like me should want to contact him?
Diane, I'm pretty sure you've got my email address, my home address AND my phone number!
It's a good thing that I'm so normal and sensible then isn't it.
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Congratulations, Colin!
By the way, shouldn't this have been the 2008 caption competition, seeing that we're not yet in 2009 and all that?
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Excellent point, Tom. I suggest that all entries be considered null and void. I can't believe Mince didn't pick it up.
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My entries were for next year's competition. They mature with age.
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Yep---and I replied, saying that I'd send off your prize in the next day or two, Colin. Strange you didn't receive it.
I might have done.
I logged of shortly after I sent it.
I'm at work just now so can't check here.
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I did post a reply complaining about the travesty masquerading as a result, but apparently the Forum swear filter DOES have a limit, and automatically converts your text to Cyrillic script once you've exceeded it.
Suffice to say I thought the result was a heap of ??? ???? ????????? ?????????? ? ??????? ? ????? ??????????? ? ??????. ??? ???????? ??????? ? ???????? ? ?????? ????????? ? ????????? ???? ????? ? ???? ????????.
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I did post a reply complaining about the travesty masquerading as a result, but apparently the Forum swear filter DOES have a limit, and automatically converts your text to Cyrillic script once you've exceeded it.
Suffice to say I thought the result was a heap of ??? ???? ????????? ?????????? ? ??????? ? ????? ??????????? ? ??????. ??? ???????? ??????? ? ???????? ? ?????? ????????? ? ????????? ???? ????? ? ???? ????????.
I'm sure Mince will pick you up for incorrect use of the "?" in "???????? ? ??????" ..0
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He can try, but I warn him I'm from Moscow.
http://guide.visitscotland.com/vs/guide/5,en,SCH1/objectId,RGN763vs,curr,GBP,season,at1,selectedEntry,home/home.html (http://guide.visitscotland.com/vs/guide/5,en,SCH1/objectId,RGN763vs,curr,GBP,season,at1,selectedEntry,home/home.html)
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Thanks Roger, the large brown envelope has arrived. ;D
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You're welcome, Colin. Congratulations again.
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Roger, do another competition.
How about best post made at 08:44:20 pm on 6 December 2008?
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Your avatar---where is that? Um...that's not the competition.
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It's the place where the moon goes to bed.
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Roger, do another competition.
How about best post made at 08:44:20 pm on 6 December 2008?
It should be 20:44.
08:44 is am.
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Roger, do another competition.
How about best post made at 08:44:20 pm on 6 December 2008?
It should be 20:44.
08:44 is am.
This forum doesn't run on a 24-hour clock, does it? ???
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Roger, do another competition.
How about best post made at 08:44:20 pm on 6 December 2008?
It should be 20:44.
08:44 is am.
This forum doesn't run on a 24-hour clock, does it? ???
It does.
Look at the time of your post.
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Roger, do another competition.
How about best post made at 08:44:20 pm on 6 December 2008?
It should be 20:44.
08:44 is am.
This forum doesn't run on a 24-hour clock, does it? ???
It does.
Look at the time of your post.
Colin, I am looking at the time of my post and it says:
Quote from: Vulture on Yesterday at 10:43:58 pm ???
Besides which, if it were a 24-hour clock, the am and pm wouldn't appear.
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Roger, do another competition.
How about best post made at 08:44:20 pm on 6 December 2008?
It should be 20:44.
08:44 is am.
This forum doesn't run on a 24-hour clock, does it? ???
It does.
Look at the time of your post.
Colin, I am looking at the time of my post and it says:
Quote from: Vulture on Yesterday at 10:43:58 pm ???
Besides which, if it were a 24-hour clock, the am and pm wouldn't appear.
It seems that you don't have the clock timings set in your profile to show the 24 hour clock, but don't worry, the forum isn't going to explode ;D
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If it were going to explode, what time would that take place on an AM/PM clock Colin?
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If it were going to explode, what time would that take place on an AM/PM clock Colin?
High noon.
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If it were going to explode, what time would that take place on an AM/PM clock Colin?
High noon.
Hello, Fido.
Passed on by The Peepmaster, on behalf of Peter Noone (minus his Hermits).
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Belated congratulations, Colin - well deserved!
Commiserations, Malc. You obviously don't have what it takes. My tongue appears to be stuck in my cheek. Couldn't find a decent emoticon for that.
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My tongue appears to be stuck in my cheek. Couldn't find a decent emoticon for that.
:-\ This one's the closest.
:\ Or this.
:P This one's got his tongue OUTside his cheek
:o This one's got someone's tongue between his cheeks.
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My tongue appears to be stuck in my cheek. Couldn't find a decent emoticon for that.
:-\ This one's the closest.
:\ Or this.
:P This one's got his tongue OUTside his cheek
:o This one's got someone's tongue between his cheeks.
or any of these
(http://www.cosgan.de/images/midi/frech/a010.gif) (http://www.cosgan.de/images/midi/frech/a020.gif) (http://www.cosgan.de/images/midi/frech/a080.gif) (http://www.cosgan.de/images/more/bigs/c027.gif)
This is the site for the smillies.
http://www.cosgan.de/smilie.php?wahl=18&ziel=bigs (http://www.cosgan.de/smilie.php?wahl=18&ziel=bigs)
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Happy Christmas to all the smilies, who have served us so well, without complaint, throughout 2008.
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;D This the one you modelled your avatar on.
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(http://malcmcgookin.files.wordpress.com/2008/12/nige-smiley4.gif?w=22&h=22)
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(http://malcmcgookin.files.wordpress.com/2008/12/nige-smiley4.gif?w=22&h=22)
:D :D :D
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(http://malcmcgookin.files.wordpress.com/2008/12/nige-smiley4.gif?w=22&h=22)
Hey, that's very clever. What else did you get for Christmas? ..0
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(http://i202.photobucket.com/albums/aa202/sketch1959/horace%20comp.jpg) (http://s202.photobucket.com/user/sketch1959/media/horace%20comp.jpg.html)