Beau Peep Notice Board

Beau Peep Notice Board => Outpourings => Topic started by: The Peepmaster on September 10, 2007, 07:13:34 PM

Title: Terracotta Army
Post by: The Peepmaster on September 10, 2007, 07:13:34 PM
I've just been watching this on TV. China has lent some of those amazing artifacts to the British Museum. The army was created to guard the first Emperor from evil spirits after his death. Just the name Terracotta Army inspires admiration and awe.





I'd be lucky to get a pottery bodyguard.
Title: Re: Teracotta Army
Post by: Roger Kettle on September 10, 2007, 07:38:27 PM
Or a plastic nightwatchman.
Title: Re: Teracotta Army
Post by: The Peepmaster on September 10, 2007, 08:04:06 PM
Maybe a polystyrene babysitter.  :(
Title: Re: Teracotta Army
Post by: Tom on September 10, 2007, 08:07:39 PM
Is that like a chocolate fireguard?
Title: Re: Teracotta Army
Post by: The Peepmaster on September 10, 2007, 08:20:19 PM
I expect the Chinese are sitting there back home now imagining that these magnificent archaeological finds that they've loaned to our principal museum are stimulating intellectual debate on forums across the UK...  ::)
Title: Re: Teracotta Army
Post by: Roger Kettle on September 10, 2007, 08:32:20 PM
I'm off to watch that thing about comics on B.B.C. Four so I'm deserting the Teracotta Army for a while.
Title: Re: Teracotta Army
Post by: Vulture on September 10, 2007, 08:45:20 PM
I expect the Chinese are sitting there back home now imagining that these magnificent archaeological finds that they've loaned to our principal museum are stimulating intellectual debate on forums across the UK...  ::)

No, Peepmaster. The Chinese are rubbing their hands with glee; do you know how much it's costing the British to 'borrow' this 'ere army?
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: The Peepmaster on September 10, 2007, 09:06:00 PM
I think I started all this off wrong by spelling terracotta wrongly  :-\
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Vulture on September 10, 2007, 09:08:53 PM
I think I started all this off wrong by spelling terracotta wrongly  :-\

Where's Mince when you need him?
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: The Peepmaster on September 10, 2007, 09:14:03 PM
I think I started all this off wrong by spelling terracotta wrongly  :-\

Where's Mince when you need him?

Didn't Peter lock him out the house?
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Vulture on September 10, 2007, 09:22:18 PM
I think I started all this off wrong by spelling terracotta wrongly  :-\

Where's Mince when you need him?

Didn't Peter lock him out the house?

So that's why it's so quiet! Does this mean we can mis-spell with impunity? :D
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: The Peepmaster on September 10, 2007, 09:26:02 PM
Yep! Im gonna miss-spel wiv loadsa impewnity!
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: peter on September 10, 2007, 09:31:42 PM
Yep! Im gonna miss-spel wiv loadsa impewnity!

Can you not think up your own way to annoy Mince.
I know its flattering to be copied but would  have thought you better than that.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: peter on September 10, 2007, 09:48:29 PM
I think I started all this off wrong by spelling terracotta wrongly  :-\

I did not want to bring up the spelling mistake.
You have me worried only today the men repairing my roof asking me if I want some terracotta tiles to finish it off. Odd will I have a soldier on top of my roof.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: The Peepmaster on September 10, 2007, 09:57:52 PM
I think I started all this off wrong by spelling terracotta wrongly  :-\

I did not want to bring up the spelling mistake.
You have me worried only today the men repairing my roof asking me if I want some terracotta tiles to finish it off. Odd will I have a soldier on top of my roof.

Soldiers especially like a night on the tiles.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: peter on September 10, 2007, 10:06:09 PM
I think I started all this off wrong by spelling terracotta wrongly  :-\

I did not want to bring up the spelling mistake.
You have me worried only today the men repairing my roof asking me if I want some terracotta tiles to finish it off. Odd will I have a soldier on top of my roof.

Soldiers especially like a night on the tiles.

Sorry it will be longer than a one night stand for my Terracotta soldier
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: The Peepmaster on September 10, 2007, 10:35:26 PM
I think I started all this off wrong by spelling terracotta wrongly  :-\

I did not want to bring up the spelling mistake.
You have me worried only today the men repairing my roof asking me if I want some terracotta tiles to finish it off. Odd will I have a soldier on top of my roof.

Soldiers especially like a night on the tiles.

Sorry it will be longer than a one night stand for my Terracotta soldier

He'll be your own Pottery Private.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: peter on September 12, 2007, 11:55:55 AM
I think I started all this off wrong by spelling terracotta wrongly  :-\

I did not want to bring up the spelling mistake.
You have me worried only today the men repairing my roof asking me if I want some terracotta tiles to finish it off. Odd will I have a soldier on top of my roof.

Soldiers especially like a night on the tiles.

Sorry it will be longer than a one night stand for my Terracotta soldier

He'll be your own Pottery Private.

I hope not I cannot reach that high.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Mince on September 12, 2007, 01:40:50 PM
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: peter on September 12, 2007, 03:07:48 PM
Pretty
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: The Peepmaster on September 12, 2007, 04:13:44 PM
Pretty Stupid
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Mince on September 12, 2007, 10:34:42 PM
Peepmaster's list of people to call stupid.

1. Peter [DONE]

2. Roger [DONE]

3. Mince [DONE]

4. . . .
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Roger Kettle on September 13, 2007, 01:36:00 PM
Peeps, this week's Private Eye has a Terracotta Army gag similar to your original post---and your rubbish appeared two days before the current P.E. hit the streets!
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: The Peepmaster on September 13, 2007, 02:03:56 PM
Peeps, this week's Private Eye has a Terracotta Army gag similar to your original post---and your rubbish appeared two days before the current P.E. hit the streets!

I should have thought of it 2 weeks ago and sent it in. never had a gag in P.E. We're probably not a good fit. I do buy it now and again though. I might buy a copy and send it back to them with a note saying "Sorry, not quite..."
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: The Peepmaster on September 16, 2007, 03:43:37 PM
Peeps, this week's Private Eye has a Terracotta Army gag similar to your original post---and your rubbish appeared two days before the current P.E. hit the streets!

Roger, have a look at Cartoonists.co.uk (http://www.cartoonists.co.uk) and click on the Daily Cartoons link down on the left. Take a look at Matt's gag today.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Roger Kettle on September 16, 2007, 07:22:48 PM
The only gag I could find was about a rhino----not what you meant, I presume!
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Mince on September 16, 2007, 07:25:50 PM
Here's the direct link for blind people: http://www.cartoonists.co.uk/openingpages/dailycartoon.html

(Yes, I know (hope) you were joking.)
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Roger Kettle on September 16, 2007, 07:35:45 PM
That's the gag I saw but it's neither by Matt or about the terracotta army. Me confused.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Vulture on September 16, 2007, 07:50:12 PM
That's the gag I saw but it's neither by Matt or about the terracotta army. Me confused.

Come on, Roger. You must remember when Watership Down came out: you've read the book; you've seen the film; now eat the pie!........ You've seen the army, now see the....... ;D

Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Tarquin Thunderthighs lll on September 16, 2007, 08:15:45 PM
I've a feeling Roger can't actually see the cartoon in question for some technical reason beyond me.

Maybe this will help...


(http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/graphics/2007/09/16/matt.gif)
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Mince on September 16, 2007, 08:17:38 PM
I've a feeling Roger can't actually see the cartoon in question for some technical reason beyond me.

It's more likely some technical reason beyond Roger.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Tarquin Thunderthighs lll on September 16, 2007, 08:18:29 PM
That's the gag I saw but it's neither by Matt or about the terracotta army. Me confused.

And I know that "or" was a typo, before you end up in the soup with Mince (see what I did there?).
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Mince on September 16, 2007, 08:23:01 PM
And I know that "or" was a typo, before you end up in the soup with Mince (see what I did there?).

Why does everyone think of me as a grammar curmudgeon?

By the way, Tarquin, that should have ended:  ... in the soup with Mince. (See what I did there?)
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Vulture on September 16, 2007, 08:23:32 PM
That's the gag I saw but it's neither by Matt or about the terracotta army. Me confused.

And I know that "or" was a typo, before you end up in the soup with Mince (see what I did there?).

(see what I did there?).

No  ???
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Vulture on September 16, 2007, 08:25:25 PM
And I know that "or" was a typo, before you end up in the soup with Mince (see what I did there?).

Why does everyone think of me as a grammar curmudgeon?

By the way, Tarquin, that should have ended:  ... in the soup with Mince. (See what I did there?)

Because you are a curmudgeon, grammatically or otherwise!
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Tarquin Thunderthighs lll on September 16, 2007, 08:31:44 PM
By the way, Tarquin, that should have ended:  ... in the soup with Mince. (See what I did there?)

TTTHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPP!!!


No  ???

In the soup with Mince...mince soup..."or" typo...nor...nor mince soup...play on words with misspelling thrown in...Peter will get it.

I've lost the will to live.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: The Peepmaster on September 16, 2007, 08:34:25 PM
Roger - there should be TWO gags appear on that page. I'm concerned if you're not seeing them both!

I need to ask people with PC's whether the Google strip of adverts shows on the front page too. My version of Internet Explorer doesn't show them for some reason, but it's an old version. They stopped updating it for Macs a few years ago when Apple brought out their own integrated Safari browser. I prefer Firefox by the way. The Google ads show in both those browsers.

The second cartoon, which Roger cannot see, is from a Google widget, so it maybe is that I.E. won't show anything from Google.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Diane CBPFC on September 16, 2007, 08:37:09 PM
I have the 1995 issue of the National Geographic, that shows the terra-cotta army, in my bathroom in the magazine stack. Small world eh?

Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Roger Kettle on September 16, 2007, 08:40:58 PM
I checked again, Nige, but nope----I can only see the rhino gag. I'm wearing slippers. Could this be affecting my Google widget?
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Tarquin Thunderthighs lll on September 16, 2007, 08:41:42 PM

I need to ask people with PC's whether the Google strip of adverts shows on the front page too. My version of Internet Explorer doesn't show them for some reason, but it's an old version. They stopped updating it for Macs a few years ago when Apple brought out their own integrated Safari browser. I prefer Firefox by the way. The Google ads show in both those browsers.

The second cartoon, which Roger cannot see, is from a Google widget, so it maybe is that I.E. won't show anything from Google.

Peepsie, I'm using Firefox on my laptop, and I also have IE 6.0 as a back up (and on the few occasions I've used it in the past year, it really has got my back up...see what I did th--- never mind). The Google ads appear in both.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Mince on September 16, 2007, 08:42:09 PM
I have the 1995 issue of the National Geographic, that shows the terra-cotta army, in my bathroom in the magazine stack. Small world eh?

It must be a small world if your bathroom is in the magazine stack.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Tarquin Thunderthighs lll on September 16, 2007, 08:45:11 PM
I checked again, Nige, but nope----I can only see the rhino gag. I'm wearing slippers. Could this be affecting my Google widget?

Are they tartan slippers, Roger - that's crucial? Also, do you have stick-it memos covering large parts of your screen?

I have the 1995 issue of the National Geographic, that shows the terra-cotta army, in my bathroom in the magazine stack. Small world eh?

It must be a small world if your bathroom is in the magazine stack.

You're relentless and unforgiving, Mincey. That isn't intended as a compliment, though no doubt you'll take it as one.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: The Peepmaster on September 16, 2007, 08:46:08 PM
I'm amazed the terracotta army was (a) in her bathroom, and (b) there was a picture of it in a magazine.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Mince on September 16, 2007, 08:46:59 PM
You're relentless and unforgiving, Mincey.

Yes, I must admit that I am feeling generous today.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Mince on September 16, 2007, 08:48:55 PM
I'm amazed the terracotta army was (a) in her bathroom, and (b) there was a picture of it in a magazine.

I would have done that gag if she had not used parenthetic commas. Notice that, unlike Peepmaster, I do show some restraint.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Tarquin Thunderthighs lll on September 16, 2007, 08:49:59 PM
Yes, but he just guesses.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: The Peepmaster on September 16, 2007, 08:53:16 PM
I'm amazed the terracotta army was (a) in her bathroom, and (b) there was a picture of it in a magazine.

I would have done that gag if she had not used parenthetic commas. Notice that, unlike Peepmaster, I do show some restraint.

Even terracotta armies have to be bathed.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Diane CBPFC on September 16, 2007, 08:56:36 PM
I won?t tell you now what else I have in my bathroom ? you grammatical nit-pickers!
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Mince on September 16, 2007, 08:57:29 PM
I won?t tell you now what else I have in my bathroom ? you grammatical nit-pickers!

Are you saying that we are in your bathroom.  :o
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: The Peepmaster on September 16, 2007, 08:59:13 PM
I'm amazed the terracotta army was (a) in her bathroom, and (b) there was a picture of it in a magazine.

I would have done that gag if she had not used parenthetic commas. Notice that, unlike Peepmaster, I do show some restraint.

Even terracotta armies have to be bathed.

As well as terracotta leggies, of course.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Diane CBPFC on September 16, 2007, 08:59:56 PM
You go where the laptop goes Mincy
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Mince on September 16, 2007, 09:03:38 PM
You use your laptop in the bath?
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: peter on September 16, 2007, 09:08:32 PM
By the way, Tarquin, that should have ended:  ... in the soup with Mince. (See what I did there?)

TTTHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPP!!!


No  ???

In the soup with Mince...mince soup..."or" typo...nor...nor mince soup...play on words with misspelling thrown in...Peter will get it.

I've lost the will to live.
Right with you babe.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: peter on September 16, 2007, 09:11:57 PM
You go where the laptop goes Mincy
Goes in the WC as well.
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Vulture on September 16, 2007, 09:31:20 PM
I'm amazed the terracotta army was (a) in her bathroom, and (b) there was a picture of it in a magazine.

I would have done that gag if she had not used parenthetic commas. Notice that, unlike Peepmaster, I do show some restraint.

Even terracotta armies have to be bathed.

As well as terracotta leggies, of course.

 :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: Vulture on September 16, 2007, 09:32:38 PM
You go where the laptop goes Mincy


 ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? (Peter, are you using Diane's computer?)
Title: Re: Terracotta Army
Post by: peter on September 17, 2007, 09:59:02 AM
You go where the laptop goes Mincy


 ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? (Peter, are you using Diane's computer?)
Be a bit of a stretch,