Another genuine Billings Gazette headline...

[Roger Kettle]

RACCOON BEATEN TO DEATH AT WYOMING RANCH AND HOME SUPPLY STORE.

[Sandy Buttcheeks]

There's that rush to be the first dead again...

 

[Diane CBPFC]

That seems a bit excessive. Could have just shooed it out. 

I have some sort of 100% dead hawk on our deck – not sure how that happened.  I put it on some cardboard to keep it off of the snow and covered it in case it was just knocked out but it was still dead this morning.

It is a tough world for wildlife all over.

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

Twice? It was killed twice? I don't understand. Is it a sign?

[Diane CBPFC]

Still dead is not the same as twice dead. Twice dead is when you get hit by a bus at the very same time you are choking. (For an example). Still dead is when you are not sure if something is dead so leave it alone for a bit but when you go back it is still where you you left it.

[Roger Kettle]

By that reckoning, my wife will assume I'm dead.

[Sandy Buttcheeks]

That seems a bit excessive. Could have just shooed it out. 

I have some sort of 100% dead hawk on our deck – not sure how that happened.  I put it on some cardboard to keep it off of the snow and covered it in case it was just knocked out but it was still dead this morning.

It is a tough world for wildlife all over.

Maybe pretending to be knocked out was it's party piece, and unfortunately it didn't realise it was highly allergic to cardboard.

I'm thinking it finally died of anaphyl-hawk-trick shock.

 

[Diane CBPFC]

The aim of a party piece is to be the life of the party though.

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

Still dead is not the same as twice dead. Twice dead is when you get hit by a bus at the very same time you are choking. (For an example). Still dead is when you are not sure if something is dead so leave it alone for a bit but when you go back it is still where you you left it.

Diane, the poor thing was beaten to death at the Wyoming ranch, and then again at the Home Supply Store. I think that's excessive.

[Sandy Buttcheeks]

Still dead is not the same as twice dead. Twice dead is when you get hit by a bus at the very same time you are choking. (For an example). Still dead is when you are not sure if something is dead so leave it alone for a bit but when you go back it is still where you you left it.

Diane, the poor thing was beaten to death at the Wyoming ranch, and then again at the Home Supply Store. I think that's excessive.

And how exactly are you claiming that it managed to travel between the two locations, after its first unfortunate bout of death?

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

I'm claiming nothing, Sandy - it's those charlatans at the Billings Gazette with their sensationalist headlines you need to be questioning. Are they affiliated to the Daily Star?

[Sandy Buttcheeks]

Could be...

That rag will fill its pages with any old doo-doo.

 

[The Peepmaster]

I follow the Billings Gazette on Facebook, (along with 34,361 others), and have done ever since Roger alerted us to its interesting articles. https://www.facebook.com/billingsgazette

The latest post on the page is "Montana rancher finds missing horse sculptures".

It's another world out there...

[Sandy Buttcheeks]

Is it this one?