Ambitions.

[Roger Kettle]

One day, I'll write a book. It won't be about cartooning because any advice I could give is exremely succinct. Think up some, hopefully, funny ideas and either draw them or get someone else to draw them for you. That's it. Cartooning is easy.
No, my book will probably be about the Battle of the Little Bighorn and will be called something pretentious like "Montana Dreams: Custer and the Cartoonist". (Yes, I know I said it wouldn't be about cartooning but I'm going for the Custer/cartoonist alliteration). It will be on the best-selling lists for a couple of years and win countless awards. Anyway, that's my ambition. What's your's?

[Roger Kettle]

As a postscript, let me mention a famous cartoon written by the brilliant Peter Cook. Two guys are talking at a social gathering and one says "I'm writing a book". The other one replies "Neither am I".

[The Peepmaster]

I keep having the idea of writing a scary horror story. I can come up with ideas for titles, but then can't be ars bothered to write the actual story itself, so maybe it's not a vocation for me (unless I can collaborate with someone else, whereby I write the title, and he/she writes the rest).

My title ideas (and these have to be imagined in a dramatic voice), are:

"The Moon Man that Time Forgot, Who Came From the Moon, (on Wednesday)."

and the more simple (pr?cised): "The Moon Man who came from the Moon"

[Diane CBPFC]

Someday I'll write a novel...

Sounds like some more people for the Nanowrimo!
www.nanowrimo.org

I wrote for the first time in 2006 and won - but never finished the novel (you need to write 50,000 words in the month of November to win) I was also in it last year but only wrote about 7000 words.

My first novel was futuristic but starts off like a western with my lead charater hitching up her horse and wagon. The Americans have taken over Canada and are piping all the oil and water south and controling the public with christo-facist mind control in the form of brain washing at compulsory Sunday services. Some escape and one guy finally makes it home to soak in a tub and that is where I left him since 2006 - I hate to think how wrinkly he is now! Then I have a love triange and an evil agent who eats all the good biscuits and a bit with a dog. A truly wonderful piece of fiction - until you google "Canadian Water Rights" and see how some American groups have carved up the water bases of North America!

My second novel was about a teenager who tries to fit in by changing his religion almost monthly. Some of it is just to annoy his mother of course but karma bites him in the bum when he gets an all over body rash from the old orange fiberglass curtains found in the atic that he wears during his Budhist phase. That too could have been fantastic if I hadn't got too lazy and gave up.

So budding authors - join up! Dip you pen in the ink! Join your own regional lounge. Most places have parties in coffee houses or pubs. It is a good way for nerdy people like myself to make friends.

[The Peepmaster]

I keep having an urge to write a biography of James III. The off-putting bit is that I don't really know anything about him, and I'd have to do some research, which I'm not keen about. My perspective would be to write it in a way that young kids could relate to. To bring him into the 21st century, if you like. For instance, I'd explain that he never had a motorbike, not because his mum wouldn't let him, as is commonly believed, but simply because they hadn't been invented yet, stuff like that.

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

My book would need to be in a sealed plastic wrap and placed on the top shelves, to stop people nicking the free pack of crayons.

Alternatively, I've may write the autobiography of Judas Iscariot, just to set the record straight.

Then there's my Selective Guide To Reincarnation. A work in progress.

Diane, I'm well impressed, but you need to halve your cheese intake, my dear.

[Roger Kettle]

I think Peeps and Diane should get together in Newfoundland (a suitable halfway point), rent a cabin and write some books together. Their brilliant ideas should not be allowed to go unfinished. The "brilliant" probably applies to Diane's stuff more than Peepsie's.
P.S. I can't help thinking about the naming of Newfoundland...
"Bob, what d'you think we should call this new land we've found?"
"How about Newfoundland?"
"That's ******* brilliant!"

[Fyodor]

Keep it up, Rog. There might be a job for you at the Beeb soon.

[Malc]

I am writing a book, honest.

I've done all the groundwork. It's a bid to put flesh on the bones of the Bunyip legend. The bunyips are supposed to be terrifying inhabitants of waterholes and billabongs in Australia who drag unwary travellers to their doom.

I've made them more human than that. I will post some excerpts if you like. But if you don't ask, I won't. You have to ask. I'm shy.

[Joan]

I'd like to read the excerpts, Malc.  Bunyips are scary - I've always been easily spooked by things like that.  I used to be a night light kid - absolutely terrified of the dark.

[Malc]

Oh, all right, seeing as it's you, Joan.

This was a project I had lined up for animation, but I couldn't get the funding. I even have a contingency plan to make it as a British thing called Boggurts.

What I found out the hard way was that no-one is interested in a well thought-out, well designed project that hasn't already made it into print. Unless, that is, you already have a long term relationship, (an "in") to a TV producer, such as Ragdoll has with the Beeb.

These long term relationships are almost always legacies from the 70s and 80s, when the process of commissioning new series for kids TV was very different from what it is now.

[Diane CBPFC]

I was going to post an exerpt from my first book to prove it wasn't cheezy - but I can't find the disk so you are out of luck.

[Joan]

Shame, Diane.  I remember the site from way back when my bookwriting ambition hit me.  Never quite got going - maybe later.  Well done on winning - can't have been cheezy at all.

[Jack]

Someday I'll write a novel...

Sounds like some more people for the Nanowrimo!
www.nanowrimo.org

I wrote for the first time in 2006 and won - but never finished the novel (you need to write 50,000 words in the month of November to win) I was also in it last year but only wrote about 7000 words.

I tried NaNoWriMo in 2005 and 2006. Failed miserably each time. A little too busy this year though - I simply haven't the time to devote towards not writing a novel.

[Colin]

When I was in the Army in the late 80's in Northern Ireland I was in a group of 8 who were invloved in an attack on our checkpoint by the IRA.
2 of my mates died, 1 was injured.
Just after that we were given counselling.
We were told that it might be good to right a few lines about what happened that day.

I thought, ok, I'll give it a go.

I ended up writing 8 pages of A4.

People that have read it have said I should get it published, but that wasn't my intention when it was written.

I was 23 at the time.

Just thought I would add my tuppence worth.