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Author Topic: First day of spring - poet's corner  (Read 14062 times)

Tom

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Re: First day of spring - poet's corner
« Reply #15 on: March 29, 2007, 08:33:48 PM »
Yet some might not,
(Just following Roger's lead)
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Offline Tarquin Thunderthighs lll

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Re: First day of spring - poet's corner
« Reply #16 on: March 29, 2007, 11:51:18 PM »
And it touches the spot...
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Offline Roger Kettle

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Re: First day of spring - poet's corner
« Reply #17 on: March 30, 2007, 09:16:57 AM »
I'm not doing the last line.
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Offline The Peepmaster

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Re: First day of spring - poet's corner
« Reply #18 on: March 30, 2007, 10:09:34 AM »
To Lonnie Don', it's Skiffle!
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Offline Tarquin Thunderthighs lll

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Re: First day of spring - poet's corner
« Reply #19 on: March 30, 2007, 10:55:28 AM »
Bravo!
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Offline Mince

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Re: First day of spring - poet's corner
« Reply #20 on: March 30, 2007, 11:36:41 AM »
There once was a man called Kettle . . .
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Offline The Peepmaster

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Re: First day of spring - poet's corner
« Reply #21 on: March 30, 2007, 11:47:18 AM »
Quote from: Mince on March 30, 2007, 11:36:41 AM
There once was a man called Kettle . . .
Who said to his agent, "I bet all...
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Offline Tarquin Thunderthighs lll

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Re: First day of spring - poet's corner
« Reply #22 on: March 30, 2007, 11:53:53 AM »
Every penny I've earned...
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Offline The Peepmaster

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Re: First day of spring - poet's corner
« Reply #23 on: March 30, 2007, 04:31:23 PM »
Hmm - it stopped there as that line didn't really follow on correctly Tarks!

Here's a complete limerick I've writ in honour of the great man:

There once was a guy called Rog Kettle
Who rued (to himself), "Why the hell do all
Other folk - guys and dames,
Have normal-type names
And not kitchen goods made of metal.

...Apart from Derek Fridge-Magnet of Grimsby, that is.
« Last Edit: March 30, 2007, 05:31:39 PM by The Peepmaster »
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Offline Tarquin Thunderthighs lll

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Re: First day of spring - poet's corner
« Reply #24 on: March 30, 2007, 05:59:35 PM »
There once was a man called Kettle,
Who said to his agent, "I bet all,
Every penny I've earned,
That where drinks are concerned,
The Peepmaster's wallet is constructed of cast-iron metal."


Apology accepted, Peepsie.  :P
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Offline Tarquin Thunderthighs lll

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Re: First day of spring - poet's corner
« Reply #25 on: March 30, 2007, 06:02:11 PM »
And "bet all" was a forced enough rhyme for Kettle - I'm not even going to comment on "hell do all".  :P :P :P
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Offline Roger Kettle

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Re: First day of spring - poet's corner
« Reply #26 on: March 30, 2007, 06:40:40 PM »
I agree, Tarky. "Kettle" and "Hell do all" is a shocking rhyme. I think he peaked with the "skiffle" line.
There was a young man from Bute
Who the local "burds" thought cute.
Can mass myopia
On this island Utopia
Be the reason they fall for this brute?
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Fyodor

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Re: First day of spring - poet's corner
« Reply #27 on: March 30, 2007, 06:53:14 PM »
A limerick's not hard to do -
You have to admit that is true.
The rhyme scheme's a doddle,
But get in your noddle
That scansion is a critical element too.
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Offline The Peepmaster

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Re: First day of spring - poet's corner
« Reply #28 on: March 30, 2007, 07:35:43 PM »
Quote from: Roger Kettle on March 30, 2007, 06:40:40 PM
I agree, Tarky. "Kettle" and "Hell do all" is a shocking rhyme. I think he peaked with the "skiffle" line.
There was a young man from Bute
Who the local "burds" thought cute.
Can mass myopia
On this island Utopia
Be the reason they fall for this brute?


Roger, I'm so flattered...

Don't forget, I was the guy who rhymed "Indian" with "Our Gran" once... (I wonder if I can dig out those old limericks...)
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Offline The Peepmaster

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Re: First day of spring - poet's corner
« Reply #29 on: March 30, 2007, 07:39:17 PM »
What joy! I have found those old Wild West limericks of yore!...

An Indian chief called Stiff Breezy
In a wigwam had breakfasts quite greasy
He drank so much tea
That he needed to pee
But to pee in a teepee's not easy


George Michael and Ridgley, (the group "Wham")
On a tour, saw a sqaw by a wigwam,
The Chief saw them stare
At her long flowing hair
And said, "Can't you see it's a wig, Wham?"


This limerick's entitled "Gun Fight at the OK Corral".

Bang, bang, bang, ping, bang, Argggh! bang, bang, bang,
Bang, bang, Argggh! bang, ping, bang, bang, bang, bang,
Bang, Bang, Argggh! Bang, Bang,
Bang, Argggh! Bang, Bang, Bang,
Bang, bang, bang, bang, Argggh! bang, ping, bang, bang


There once was a sad Indian,
Who blubbered like hell to his Gran,
"I now can't send jokes
In signals of smoke,
'Cause Parliament's brought in a ban!"


Called up before General Custer
The Indian brave tried to bluster
That though he's been fined
Twenty quid, would they mind
If sixpence was all he could muster?


Lying wounded and prone 'neath the stars
(Gazing upwards at Venus and Mars),
Big Jed said to Tonto,
"Get help to me pronto,
These arrows are gonna leave scars!"


This Indian's Gran had an Uncle
(A fan of the great Art Garfunkle)
Who built (from his pension)
A wigwam extension
Prince Charles called a hideous carbuncle


That Indian's Gran's Uncle's Niece
Was notoriously difficult to please
They tried it with chocs,
Bright coloured socks,
And even a new pipe-of-peace


In an unfriendly bar near Black Canyon
A cowboy informed his companion
"The both of us thinks
The food in here stinks,
Why don't we pop out for an Indian?
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