Well, she's back. Demonstrating her unrivalled knowledge of dust she identified three dust free areas on the kitchen table, "hat shaped" as she described them, after that it all went a little downhill. There's been this "thing" knocking around the kitchen all week, getting in the way all the time, eventually I lost my temper and threw it out. Now apparently we need a new ironing board.
As for Pedro, he's for real it seems, at least judging from the copious holiday snaps of the handsome, boat owning...turns out my wife has also been cavorting with whales and dolphins, I'm praying that's not a euphemism.
I got my own back, in a fit of pique I swapped over my socks and my undies drawers...