Beau Peep Notice Board
Beau Peep Notice Board => Outpourings => Topic started by: Roger Kettle on April 09, 2012, 08:45:02 PM
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Since turning 60 last year, a number that can be fairly used to define "old", I have been desperately searching for any benefits that such an age offers. There's the free bus pass, I suppose, which probably saves me around 4 pounds a week and, well, that's about it. Sadly, the British culture is not like, say, the Cheyenne culture which reveres its elders. (Not that I particularly want the local youths to ask me about the best way to skin an elk, but you know what I mean). Since we sexagenarians are clearly not going to get the respect we surely deserve, I am not going to look for it. I have decided to become an eccentric old man.
All I need now is a few tips....
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Willy Nelson does old well. The trick is, if you do decide to grow a ponytail like his, not to put any ribbons in it.
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No ribbons. Gotcha. This is just the kind of stuff I'm looking for.
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I have decided to become an eccentric old man.
All I need now is a few tips....
I'm 56 this year and already on that rocky road, I suspect true eccentricity isn't something one can simply adopt, whether that's a good thing or a bad one I don't really know, but if I may [and I will] venture an opinion I'd say relax and let it come naturally, I suspect the wait won't be long. There are some bonuses to getting older, younger people imagine you can no longer do something and thus do it for you, you just have to grunt a few appropriate remarks instead. I don't have to lie any more, Suzanne does that for me now, she prefers that to my rather more blunt methods of refusing certain social engagements for example.
And being [foolishly] considered "wise" can be fun, provided you can generate enough distance between yourself and the pearl of wisdom you produce should you need to, again grunting and muttering can be used effectively.
Alternately to speed things along if you must [pearl of wisdom approaching] you might want to consider authoring an eccentric daily cartoon strip...
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I think I'll just break wind in public a lot.
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I think I'll just break wind in public a lot.
My mistake, I thought you were looking for something new to do.
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I think I'll just break wind in public a lot.
My mistake, I thought you were looking for something new to do.
;D ;D ;D
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One: I can't sing!
Two: I started dying my hair when I reached sixty and I have no idea how grey/white my hair has become!
Roger, pushing the sixty-six mark is a damned good excuse not to do anything you don't fancy doing! ;)
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For a start, Roger, sixty is not defined as "old". As long ago as the Fifties, a 60 year old was regarded as late middle age. So there. The point of my obervation is to refuse you permission to start loosening the belt, fart at will, make obtuse remarks and generally develop into a bowls-playing, motorist-hating curmudgeon. For now.
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For authenticity you could also include that faint whiff of stale urine, you can get it in Boots apparently [the chemist not the footwear hence the 'B'].
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Poor old Will, everybody farting and firing at him.
I thought I'd get that in before anyone else does. :(
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...loosening the belt, fart at will, make obtuse remarks and generally develop into a bowls-playing, motorist-hating curmudgeon...
Might be a tad harsh ruling all of this out, all that's left is sucking or "gumming" on small pieces of tablet nursie prepares for him...