Beau Peep Notice Board
Beau Peep Notice Board => Outpourings => Topic started by: Roger Kettle on February 15, 2008, 08:47:30 PM
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It's been a bit quiet lately so I'll take a little ramble and see where it goes. Today has been an "Andy Capp" day, which means I lie on a couch and try to think up jokes about a man who lies on a couch. Amazingly (to me,at least), it's been nearly ten years since I wrote my first "Andy Capp" script. The great Reg Smythe died in June 1998 and I was asked, a couple of months later, if I'd like to take up the writing side of the strip. Because Reg left behind a huge amount of unpublished work, my scripts were only slotted in periodically until this backlog eventually ran out. I guess I've been writing it on a daily basis for about seven or eight years now and it's been a strange, but rewarding, experience. It was an impossible act to follow---Reg was a cartooning genius---and I've tried desperately hard not to turn Andy's mate, Chalkie, into an urban Dennis!
Switching on the news at lunchtime was depressing on two counts. Another campus nutcase in The States has slaughtered at least six innocent people and, secondly, this was regarded as so mundane that it was way down in the running order. As most of you know, I'm a great lover of the American West (I regard Montana as the equal best place on earth) and news of this kind saddens me greatly.
So it's back to work at being funny for a living. Sorry, that sounds self-pitying and I don't mean it to. I am extremely lucky to get paid for a job I love doing. I'm sure you'd get the same response from the other cartoonists who visit this site---Peeps, Tarks and Malky. We get money for being stupid and that can't be bad!
I've just checked the result of the 6.50 at Wolverhampton where I had put a tenner on Follow The Flag.
All in all, it's been a good day.
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Roger, the reason your post had lots of white space at the end was that you left loads of newlines at the end. I have removed them for you. Aren't I nice?
I bet you thought this was a thoughtful response to your post. Well, it isn't. Three students have irritated me today and I just wanted to annoy you and ruin the rest of your day. ;D
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For over a quarter of a century, I've been trying to keep hold of an air of dignity about what I do. NOW I'm told I get paid for being stupid.
Well, it's not enough, I tell you! I'm far more stupid than I'm given credit for.
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I am extremely lucky to get paid for a job I love doing. I'm sure you'd get the same response from the other cartoonists who visit this site---Peeps, Tarks and Malky. We get money for being stupid and that can't be bad!
I thought Peeps was a lollipop man and his uniform was why all the babes were after him.
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Switch over to Channel Four and watch YouTube clips.
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Roger, the reason your post had lots of white space at the end was that you left loads of newlines at the end. I have removed them for you. Aren't I nice?
I bet you thought this was a thoughtful response to your post. Well, it isn't. Three students have irritated me today and I just wanted to annoy you and ruin the rest of your day. ;D
I have no idea what any of this means. "Newlines"?
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I often wish I could do your job... it seems much more fun and interesting than mine.
If you weren't in the cartooning field (or whatever job you are doing now - not excluding anyone!), have you ever thought what you could have been doing now?
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I have no idea what any of this means. "Newlines"?
Carriage returns. What you get when you press the return/enter key.
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I have no idea what any of this means. "Newlines"?
Carriage returns. What you get when you press the return/enter key.
I have no idea what this means. "Carriage returns"? "Return/enter key"?
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It's
what
stops
words
from
staying
on
the
same
line.
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I have no idea what this means. "It's"?
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I often wish I could do your job... it seems much more fun and interesting than mine.
If you weren't in the cartooning field (or whatever job you are doing now - not excluding anyone!), have you ever thought what you could have been doing now?
An archaeologist. I've always been fascinated by history and I'd love to have been involved with some kind of dramatic, historical discovery.
That or a pimp.
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I have no idea what this means. "It's"?
Nice, Roger!! :D :D :D :D :D
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I would have been a professional football player if wasn't for my dodgy ankles. I started picking up injuries at about 17 and as I worked for Tescos as a trainee manager (shelf stacker/trolley boy in other words) I could only play Sunday football, which meant I was straight back into work on Monday, often with swollen, purple ankles from torn ligaments.
In terms of working conditions, Tescos was probably the most disgusting organization to work for at the time (round about when Thatcher came to power) they often worked us a full 24 hour shift - with time for lunch, obviously, otherwise that would be draconian- then sent us home for a six hour sleep expecting us back in immediately after. Absolute pigs. The fact that S.W. Scotland at that time was one of the worst unemployment black spots in Europe played right into their hands and they exploited it, driving wages DOWN.
Anyway, I would have been a professional footballer if it wasn't for Thatcher and Tescos.
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I would have been a professional football player if wasn't for my dodgy ankles. I started picking up injuries at about 17 and as I worked for Tescos as a trainee manager (shelf stacker/trolley boy in other words) I could only play Sunday football, which meant I was straight back into work on Monday, often with swollen, purple ankles from torn ligaments.
In terms of working conditions, Tescos was probably the most disgusting organization to work for at the time (round about when Thatcher came to power) they often worked us a full 24 hour shift - with time for lunch, obviously, otherwise that would be draconian- then sent us home for a six hour sleep expecting us back in immediately after. Absolute pigs. The fact that S.W. Scotland at that time was one of the worst unemployment black spots in Europe played right into their hands and they exploited it, driving wages DOWN.
Anyway, I would have been a professional footballer if it wasn't for Thatcher and Tescos.
I dont soppose for 1 minute it was due to a lack of skill.
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Career discusions between Beau and Dennis from Feb'81:
Beau: Y'know Dennis, it's funny how life turns out. I remember as a young lad in music class dreaming of being a great conductor.
Dennis: I suppose the one-man buses put an end to all that.
Beau: What do you think you'd be doing now, Dennis, if you weren't in the Legion?
Dennis: Oh, I don't know. I was always pretty good with my hands. Probably a pick-pocket.
Beau: Y'know Dennis, I sometimes feel that life has passed me by. But for one cruel twist of fate, I could have been a concert pianist!
Dennis: What was that?
Beau : I couldn't play the piano.
Beau: Where did you work before you joined up, Pierre?
Mad Pierre: A slaughterhouse.
Beau: That's...er...nice. What happened?
Mad Pierre: I got sacked after two hours. I was enjoying myself - I'd slaughtered about a hundred but turns out there was a machine I should've been using.
;D
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I dont soppose for 1 minute it was due to a lack of skill.
You soppose wrong, I was known as Golden Boots.
Mind you, that stopped when they brought in those wider continental-style urinals.
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I dont soppose for 1 minute it was due to a lack of skill.
You soppose wrong, I was known as Golden Boots.
Mind you, that stopped when they brought in those wider continental-style urinals.
:D
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I dont soppose for 1 minute it was due to a lack of skill.
You soppose wrong, I was known as Golden Boots.
Mind you, that stopped when they brought in those wider continental-style urinals.
:D :D :D
(I laughed more than Mince).
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You crawler! Talk about licking someone's boots! Or perhaps not . . . in this case.
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You crawler! Talk about licking someone's boots! Or perhaps not . . . in this case.
:D :D
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You crawler! Talk about licking someone's boots! Or perhaps not . . . in this case.
:D :D :D