Beau Peep Notice Board
Beau Peep Notice Board => Outpourings => Topic started by: Roger Kettle on May 02, 2008, 10:32:13 PM
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I'm hoping that this will be fertile ground for us all and I will start the ball rolling with...oh, Lord, where to begin.....
Okay, as a non-driver, I travel by bus a lot. I make a point of having the exact fare ready to pass to the driver or, if not, something close. Now, this is not a difficult concept. You know you're about to board a bus and you know you're going to have to pay for the journey so you prepare for the transaction. Oh, no. The two women in front of me (and I apologise for the sexism) are completely taken by surprise when the bus turns up. Despite having been waiting for five minutes, it has not occurred to either of them to have a couple of coins at the ready. More than that, they have no idea where their purse is. What follows is a thirty second rummage through their handbag, a cry of delight when they find their purse and a further forty five seconds as they count out their change. I find this mildly annoying.
Having looked at the heading of this post again, I will be disappointed if the words "Mince" or "Peepmaster" appear in any of the replies.
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I have to agree with you, Roger. It does seem to be women who are taken by surprise with it comes to paying when they've queued for ages.
My experiences are usually in Sainsbury's; they stand in line for upwards of ten minutes, tutting as each one of the five people ahead of them fumbles getting a plastic bag open then, when it's their turn, they chat away to the check-out girl as though they're at a tea-party. Finally, everything is packed THEN they find their handbag is at the bottom of the trolley, underneath the multitude of orange bags....... I don't know why they do it week after week.
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Hang on a second, please .......
...... Thanks. I was just about to post, I knew I was just about to post and, would you believe it, I couldn't find my clicking finger.
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The problem isn't women, as I'm sure we all know, it's people who have become too secure and familiar with their environment.
Women generally inhabit and utilise shops, supermarkets and buses (outside rush hour) more than men. They see it as THEIR environment, they assume that the universe provides this world for them as though by magic, and expect this arrangement to last forever, fuelled and paid for by an unseen and benevolent host.
On the subject of buses: Bus travel is too convenient, and bus drivers should be just that - drivers.
The concept of social bus users being prepared, thinking ahead, making things easier for the drones who have to work within the system, is alien to them. They would no more consider how the buses are provided than eat dog poo off the pavement. The buses come, they get on them, they faff about with change, the end.
The only solution is to re-educate these passengers in the practice of travelling without money. They should have to buy a prepaid card which they slot into a machine next to the driver, who sits behind a perspex screen and does not communicate. Once the money on the card is used up, they can't travel unless they buy a new card, which is only available from high street newsagents, garages or post offices.
If they are at the head of the queue and they have card problems, they stand to the side, the rest of the passengers merely file past, slotting in their cards as they go. They also get the best seats. Passengers with cards hidden at the bottom of their shopping bags therefore board last.
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I have a bug-bear with queue jumpers when I'm waiting in traffic. I patiiently wait behind the car in front, and the other six or seven in front of them, when somebody races past in the bus lane, expecting to be let in at the front of the queue. And usually they are. Grrrrr. There. I've said it. Now I can move on.
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I'll get on to other people who annoy me later, but some people may look at my bus comments and say "How will a card recognise the different fares for different distances on a route?"
Answer is simple: On an urban route, you pay one price every trip -say, 60p, no matter if you are travelling five stops or fifty. The card reader machine is connected up to a master computer at base, which monitors all cards (same way your pre-paid telephone card works).
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Tom, queue jumping cars in my experience are never let in, the cars in the "correct" lane invariably bunch together to keep the jumper out. Quite right too. Let the bastard wait.
It's different for cars coming off a slip road, you let them slot in one at a time. If a car comes off a slip, and it's ahead of you, looking to come over, you gladly let them in, but it's annoying when cars overtake you on the inside, expecting to be let in front of you.
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Thats right! I have no problem letting people in who overtake me in the correct manner - or from slip roads. The funny thing is, I usually end up waiting behind the pusher-in at the next red traffic light ;D so we all reach the same point at the same time anyway.
I feel better already!
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The best way to re-educate these old ladies is to shout "Come on, you old bat! You should have your money ready already. Jail is too good for you."
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women who decide to put their money away in a doorway.
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Surely that's not as safe as a bank?
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I have (no exaggeration) a hundred candidates for People Who Annoy Me.
Another driving one is those people who insist on travelling 5 to 7 or so m.p.h. under the speed limit, thus keeping you back, but who floor it when a traffic light is about to go red, leaving you stuck at the lights.
People who pronounce "coupon" as "kewpong". I REALLY hate them.
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Old people in front of you on an escalator, who immediately stand still once getting off, totally oblivious to the fact that this action is causing several hundred other people to pile up on top of each other right behind them. Grrrrrr....
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People in the audience at folk clubs who sing the harmony to the performer's song, just to show they are clever (and of course to be an unofficial part of the stage act).
It's the ultimate in bad manners because the subliminal message is: "I'm enhancing the performer's performance" when it merely irritates the audience.
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Arrrgh escalator people!!! >:(
What is it about these TOTAL bastards, that makes them hurry along a mall corridor, but then stand stock still as soon as they get ON a moving walkway?
They're fit and healthy and by stopping dead on the escalator, (not to one side so others can pass) they are actually moving SLOWER than when they were walking.
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People who know they have stolen nothing who stop when the shop exit alarm goes off. I just tell them to "Get it fixed!" and walk off.
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People who shake a charity box in your face as though you have no choice but to contribute (unless you want to appear evil) and who respond negatively when you tell them to "P*ss off".
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When you go into a shop, get whatever you need and go up and pay for it.
The person behind the counter then puts all the notes and change together (and not even folded) and puts it in your hand.
You now need to put down whatever you have bought just to take the change off the notes, fold the notes and put them in your wallet / pocket and then the change in your pocket. >:(
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People who uses "Absolutely" instead of yes.
People who say "At this moment in time." instead of "At this moment."
People who say "Can I help you".
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Yeah, but when these complete and utter idiots get off and immediately STOP, blocking the exit for others who are still being carried along, they show a complete disregard for anyone else and it makes you want to barge them over, or punch their lights out! It makes me so bloody angry.
And people who walk three-abreast at the speed of about a mile a month, hogging the whole pavement, when you're walking at a normal speed behind them, and rapidly catching up. You just want to slap 'em.
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Peepmaster, I get the impression that it's just "other people" who annoy you.
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Peepmaster, I get the impression that it's just "other people" who annoy you.
Yeah, I hardly ever annoy myself these days... ::)
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From a utter waste of time perspective (rest of post deleted by Malc)
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OK, I noticed THAT.
The webmaster has arranged for the word f o o tball to be replaced by the words "waste of time", which is of itself not a worry, except when it renders someone's post incomprehensible.
With power comes responsibility.
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Peepmaster was messing about with the censored words to change people's names to other things, and I had to get rid of them twice. I put in utter waste of time to annoy him, but obviously he did not notice and left it there. I shall remove it.
This is what happens when you give Peepmaster ultimate power.
Please be assured that I am not laughing and shall deal with this seriously.
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On the subject of buses: Bus travel is too convenient, and bus drivers should be just that - drivers.
The only solution is to re-educate these passengers in the practice of travelling without money. They should have to buy a prepaid card which they slot into a machine next to the driver, who sits behind a perspex screen and does not communicate. Once the money on the card is used up, they can't travel unless they buy a new card, which is only available from high street newsagents, garages or post offices.
If they are at the head of the queue and they have card problems, they stand to the side, the rest of the passengers merely file past, slotting in their cards as they go. They also get the best seats. Passengers with cards hidden at the bottom of their shopping bags therefore board last.
This is what we have in London. They're called 'Oyster cards'. You have to top them up at stations or newsagents. You then touch the card to the 'reader' which is just on the outside of the perspex screen and the only time the driver speaks to you is if you have no credit and you have to get off. Passengers who are fumbling at the bottom of their bag are rudely pushed aside by card holders who 'touch and go'. If you want to pay cash you can, but it costs you twice as much. All bus fares are the same, whether it's one stop or to the end of the line.
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Ah....then my work is done. :D
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Ah....then my work is done. :D
You were taking the p*ss, weren't you? <-
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Honest, no.
I was in London last year but only used the Tube.
I'm exceptionally good at coming up with innovative ideas that other people have already thought of.
On the other hand, I also come up with genuinely new concepts that I can't get backing for, only to find that someone succeeds with almost exactly the same idea later.
Shrek was one of those, and the whole Freddy Krueger schlock horror thing was a story I wrote in high school.
I developed an animation series pilot with the BBC in about 1989 about a monster who comes to live in a village populated by characters from fairy tales and nursery rhymes. The BBC thought the animation was great, but didn't like the concept.
The original Shrek book by Steig was written about this time (my concept predates it) but even in that book the fairy tale characters do not feature. So could my concept have reached the US, where Dreamworks turned it into a mega hit?
It's unlikely but possible.
Many of my colleagues at Cosgrove Hall went to work in London for Spielberg's company called Amblimation, and then later moved to California where the outfit changed its name to Dreamworks. Who knows what stuff was chucked around in ideas meetings?
These things happen all the time. I was in Australia when the animation company I worked for bought the rights to my strip Blacknose The Pirate.
They took it to a meeting in France where ANOTHER company swore that they had the rights to make the same series! The second company thought had inherited Blacknose when they bought out a previous company (to whom I had sold a one year option many years before).
Like I said, it happens all the time. I know big animation companies who have paid six figure sums for rights to concepts just to stop other companies getting their hands on them.
People have been made millionaires overnight whose projects will never see the light of day.
Tricky chap, the old animation production game.
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This is inspired by a comment on another site which shall remain nameless.
I hate it when cartoonists post work on the internet and expect nothing but admiration and praise.
Further, I hate it when they react even to the praise because it's not fulsome enough!
One cartoonist, reacting to qualified praise from me, immediately went to my site and copy/pasted stuff onto the forum to make sniffy comments about MY work.
I'll ignore the copyright issues involved, it was just creepy.
Feel free to criticize anything I put up. I'm confident enough in my own abilities to weather any blows, and I do actually recognise and acknowledge valid points.
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Years ago, Andrew and I sold the rights for Beau Peep to a computer game company. (Actually, Express Newspapers got all the money). Despite paying a five figure sum, they never went ahead with the project and, instead, turned out the Grand Theft Auto series. The losers!
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They should have combined them. Beau Peep in his heavily armoured coward's car; Mad Pierre in a huge snow plough; Dennis on his bike; Honest Abdul selling munitions.
Hmmm . . . I'll make a board game out of it.