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Author Topic: Death, taxes and the 2011 Census  (Read 2107 times)

Offline Diane CBPFC

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Death, taxes and the 2011 Census
« on: May 10, 2011, 10:57:06 PM »
Hubby got a Census form to fill in and it has sat on the table unopend for weeks. I just found out that they need to be postmarked today and sent in or we could be fined and he is not around and I don't know the answers.

I feel like writing deceased on the form - then if they check back I could say, "Sorry about that he was only sleeping", that way we won't get fined. I should have been a professional criminal.

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People will come from strange lands to hear me speak my words of wisdom. They will ask me the secret of life and I will tell them. Then maybe I'll finish off with a song. The Nomad

Vulture

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Re: Death, taxes and the 2011 Census
« Reply #1 on: May 11, 2011, 05:35:35 AM »
It's the census people's own fault - fancy sending a form to a bloke! They should know by now that men don't like filling in forms or writing birthday cards. Even after I was divorced I still had to remind the ex to send his mother a card.
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Bog

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Re: Death, taxes and the 2011 Census
« Reply #2 on: May 11, 2011, 01:24:36 PM »
couldn't agree more, for my bithday my Mum bought me a diary with everyones birthdays in it, with a weeks notice as well.

didn't get one right.

still in the dog house me!
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Vulture

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Re: Death, taxes and the 2011 Census
« Reply #3 on: May 11, 2011, 02:21:55 PM »
Quote from: Bog on May 11, 2011, 01:24:36 PM
couldn't agree more, for my bithday my Mum bought me a diary with everyones birthdays in it, with a weeks notice as well.

didn't get one right.

still in the dog house me!
While you're in there, can you fill in Mr Diane's form for him? Ta!
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Offline Roger Kettle

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Re: Death, taxes and the 2011 Census
« Reply #4 on: May 11, 2011, 06:32:58 PM »
One of the many things that baffle me in life is how women can find something that men can't. I can open open a cupboard door, scan the shelves within for several minutes and be completely unable to find what I'm looking for. I ask for assistance from my wife and she'll walk over, glance inside and then pass me the previously invisible object. I think women have a secret pact with Beelzebub.
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Offline Diane CBPFC

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Re: Death, taxes and the 2011 Census
« Reply #5 on: May 11, 2011, 07:44:02 PM »
Quote from: Bog on May 11, 2011, 01:24:36 PM
couldn't agree more, for my bithday my Mum bought me a diary with everyones birthdays in it, with a weeks notice as well.

didn't get one right.

still in the dog house me!

You would think she could have bought the cards, addressed the envelopes and afixed the postage for you. Some people's mothers!
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People will come from strange lands to hear me speak my words of wisdom. They will ask me the secret of life and I will tell them. Then maybe I'll finish off with a song. The Nomad

Offline Diane CBPFC

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Re: Death, taxes and the 2011 Census
« Reply #6 on: May 11, 2011, 07:45:47 PM »
I think it is a federal offence to open other people's mail - but to heck with that I found some figures from 2008 and winged it.
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People will come from strange lands to hear me speak my words of wisdom. They will ask me the secret of life and I will tell them. Then maybe I'll finish off with a song. The Nomad

Offline Diane CBPFC

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Re: Death, taxes and the 2011 Census
« Reply #7 on: May 11, 2011, 07:47:34 PM »
Quote from: Roger Kettle on May 11, 2011, 06:32:58 PM
One of the many things that baffle me in life is how women can find something that men can't. I can open open a cupboard door, scan the shelves within for several minutes and be completely unable to find what I'm looking for. I ask for assistance from my wife and she'll walk over, glance inside and then pass me the previously invisible object. I think women have a secret pact with Beelzebub.

I sometimes wonder how feminine I am, my mother and daughter can both do that - while I am a standing-around-like-a-useless-man person.
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People will come from strange lands to hear me speak my words of wisdom. They will ask me the secret of life and I will tell them. Then maybe I'll finish off with a song. The Nomad

Offline Diane CBPFC

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Re: Death, taxes and the 2011 Census
« Reply #8 on: May 11, 2011, 08:59:44 PM »
Good grief. A census guy comes to the house with yet another census (personal - the other one was long form farm) today that required being mailed in (postmarked) yesterday.
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People will come from strange lands to hear me speak my words of wisdom. They will ask me the secret of life and I will tell them. Then maybe I'll finish off with a song. The Nomad

Fyodor

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Re: Death, taxes and the 2011 Census
« Reply #9 on: May 13, 2011, 09:57:06 AM »
Oh, you do make me laugh, Diane. You really do!
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Fyodor

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Re: Death, taxes and the 2011 Census
« Reply #10 on: May 19, 2011, 09:44:58 AM »
Quote from: Fyodor on May 13, 2011, 09:57:06 AM
Oh, you do make me laugh, Diane. You really do!
AN EXPLANATION

When at golf, yesterday, Mr Kettle suggested that the above post was made sarcastically.
It was not.
Diane, you do make me laugh.
For example, I laughed at the reckless but admirable panache shown in your post, " I think it is a federal offence to open other people's mail - but to heck with that I found some figures from 2008 and winged it."
Well, maybe I didn't actually laugh, but I certainly smiled loudly.
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Offline Diane CBPFC

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Re: Death, taxes and the 2011 Census
« Reply #11 on: May 19, 2011, 01:28:54 PM »
Fyodor, I'm sorry that you and Roger have got to discussing me on the golf course. I totally forgive you for trying to tell me what I could and could not say - and even if I was a crazy woman that had access to her hubby's huge box of guns, there is an ocean between us so you're safe. And I'm not crazy...my mother had me tested.
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People will come from strange lands to hear me speak my words of wisdom. They will ask me the secret of life and I will tell them. Then maybe I'll finish off with a song. The Nomad

Joan

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Re: Death, taxes and the 2011 Census
« Reply #12 on: June 08, 2011, 07:05:20 AM »
Quote from: Diane CBPFC on May 19, 2011, 01:28:54 PM
And I'm not crazy...my mother had me tested.

 ;D No one else got this, Diane - Sheldon rules!  ;)
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