Message from the apostrophe police

[Elizabeth]

Dennis's bike board, if you please!

[Mince]

You'll next be telling me not to split infinitives and not to end sentences with a preposition.

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

Wash behind your ears.

[The Peepmaster]

I agree with Elizabeth and Tranquil.

[peter]

i would not know but i think

[Vulture]

You'll next be telling me not to split infinitives and not to end sentences with a preposition.

Can you explain this in really, really simple words of not more than two syllables? 

[peter]

You'll next be telling me not to split infinitives and not to end sentences with a preposition.

Can you explain this in really, really simple words of not more than two syllables? 

Would you not get two infinitives if you split them.
How would the position  in the two pre's would they not be in the position before they moved.

[The Peepmaster]

You'll next be telling me not to split infinitives and not to end sentences with a preposition.

Can you explain this in really, really simple words of not more than two syllables? 

Would you not get two infinitives if you split them.
How would the position  in the two pre's would they not be in the position before they moved.

Er.. Nine o'clock I think he said.

[peter]

I tremble with anticipation its like waiting your exam results.
Don't hold your breath I have waited 6 hours for a phone call

[The Peepmaster]

Does Mince set you exams?  :

[Malc]

I was going to call my band The Errant Apostrophe's, but not only would our target audience not get it, neither did the band.

I'm an intellectual drowning in a sea of dolts.

[Roger Kettle]

A PUNKtuation band.
Sorry.

[Fyodor]

I didn't call my band The Dangling Participles.