I am officially a girlie.

[Roger Kettle]

Because of the arthritis in my fingers, I find it virtually impossible to use nail scissors. I have turned to files. Now, this in itself is both understandable and practical. What I hadn't reckoned for is the attitude that goes with it. My wife comes home late from work and I'm sitting in the dark, filing my nails. "So you've decided to come home." scritch, scritch"It's okay--I've made dinner for us". scritch,scritch " I hope you had a good day while I was at home, looking after OUR son".scritch, scritch.Help me.

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

I can recommend a good varnish.

[Malc]

It's amazing that some activities imbue you with attitude. Filing your nails has an impertinent feel, and I tend to chew gum when I'm coaching, not to be like Sir Alex, who apparently stuffs the whole packet in his mouth, but to stop me grinding my teeth down into the gums so that only the crowns are showing.

[Diane CBPFC]

You can get little battery opperated nail grinders with heads that can be changed to polish them. You should ask for one for Christmas.