Should Andy Capp have American spellings?

[Mince]

When Feather and I toured Britain it took a few days before I realised that a lot of the phrases she used did not actually mean "Fuck off!".

[Bilthehut]

As I understand it (and I'm bound to be corrected here), American spelling has generally maintained the original spelling that was around in the 1600/1700's (with the ecption of new words originated in the USA).  They then saw no need for superfluous letters.

We in the military have had a 'superior' attitude to the 'correct' spelling of english words in military papers. This is evident in the past of 'correcting' the "z"'s for "s"'s.  Naturally, there is a NATO procedure for spelling and the Oxford English Dictionary is the deciding factor (with some French one for the other official NATO language).  I have to side with our ex-colonials however, when I pointed out during a meeting that both spellings using zeds and esses were acceptable, and in most cases the zed ('zee' for you Americans out there) is the first spelling in the dictionary.   

[Bilthehut]

When Feather and I toured Britain it took a few days before I realised that a lot of the phrases she used did not actually mean "Fuck off!".

"Get out of here"?

[Malc]

I realised that a lot of the phrases she used did not actually mean "Fuck off!".

except the phrase "fuck off!" itself of course, which remains unambiguous.

[Bilthehut]

p.s.  What happened to Feather' lovely picture (avatar)?

[The Peepmaster]

 Americans would see this as part of a three-piece suit.

What, like an armchair?

[Bilthehut]

 Americans would see this as part of a three-piece suit.

What, like an armchair?

e, bah gum.  Thee appears to have missed the silent 'e' on the end of 'suit'.  Oh, no - Feather didn't put one there.  She must have meant clothing, not furniture.

[Feather]

When Feather and I toured Britain it took a few days before I realised that a lot of the phrases she used did not actually mean "Fuck off!".

Get out of here"?

"Whatever." "I don't care." "I don't want to talk about it." "Thank you."

Ask Mince about his own "fuck offs."

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

Sounds like you both had a wonderful time. 

[Vulture]

Sounds like you both had a wonderful time. 

Yes. They did. You'd never believe it was over two years ago!

[Mince]

Whatever.
  intended meaning - I'm easy either way. I'll enjoy either.
  received meaning - Do as you fucking please. I'm too pissed off to be interested.

I don't care.
  intended meaning - Neither puts me off, and I'm okay with both, so you choose.
  received meaning - You can drive the car up your own backside for all I care.

I don't want to talk about it.
  intended meaning: I think talking about that will just cause arguments.
  received meaning: Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you!

Thank you.
  intended meaning: Can I politely ask you to leave me alone for a while?
  received meaning: C*%&!

DISCLAIMER: The above is meant to be humorous, not accurate. Thank you.

[The Peepmaster]

So, when's your next meet-up planned for?

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

Whatever.
  intended meaning - I'm easy either way. I'll enjoy either.
  received meaning - Do as you fucking please. I'm too pissed off to be interested.

I don't care.
  intended meaning - Neither puts me off, and I'm okay with both, so you choose.
  received meaning - You can drive the car up your own backside for all I care.

I don't want to talk about it.
  intended meaning: I think talking about that will just cause arguments.
  received meaning: Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you!

Thank you.
  intended meaning: Can I politely ask you to leave me alone for a while?
  received meaning: C*%&!

DISCLAIMER: The above is meant to be humorous, not accurate. Thank you.

It is plainly ludicrous to suggest that this has anything whatsoever to do with geographical location. It applies equally as well (and precisely) to female natives of Walsall. 

[Mince]

So, when's your next meet-up planned for?

Less of the sarcasm, thank you!

[Roger Kettle]

I've searched YouTube in vain for a video of this trip.