Ultimate Film

[Mince]

I'm always moaning about how rubbish films are nowadays, so I thought we might all collaborate on a screen play for a new film, starting with some good ideas. You can add to things posted before, but you cannot change them. Hopefully we can show those filmmakers how it's done.

I say the film should have a woman called Gertrude who has so far predicted the lottery numbers two weeks running, but has not bought any lottery tickets.

[Redundant]

Gertrude has so far predicted the lottery numbers two weeks running, but has not bought any lottery tickets.

Oscar is a widower, he lost his wife Emma two years ago in an accident, nevertheless every day they talk, and argue.   Every day Emma tries to convince Oscar to go back to Santorini, the Greek Island where they first met...

[Mince]

This is taking on a definite supernatural theme. So how are Oscar and Gertrude linked?

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

Fur-lined handcuffs. But only on Thursdays.

[Redundant]

This is taking on a definite supernatural theme. So how are Oscar and Gertrude linked?

[They're not linked...yet]

Gertrude meanwhile was having a bad time of it, two correct predictions of the lottery numbers, but no tickets.   The problem was she wasn't convinced the predictions would still work if she actually acted on them, and she didn't have anyone else to try it instead.   When you have an ability to predict future events, even if it was "patchy" to say the least, relationships were not destined for any length of duration.   Two former boyfriends had been dumped because they were going to be unfaithful, even though they didn't know it at the time, and one because Gertrude didn't fancy waiting the two years he would spend behind bars, in about six months time.   So she hedged her bets, she predicted the lottery numbers again, but when she bought the ticket she deliberately got the last number of six wrong, now all she had to do was wait.

[Mince]

Gertrude of course knew about Oscar's penchant for fur-lined handcuffs, and knew he was destined to become a future dumped boyfriend of hers. Gertrude also knew that Emma was unaware of Oscar's infidelities concerning the same handcuffs, and was still unaware.