1. A photon walks into a hotel. The bellhop asks if he needs help with his bags. The photon replies, "No thanks, I'm travelling light."
2. The bartender says "I'm sorry sir, we don't serve faster than light particles here." A tachyon walks into a bar.
3. Did you know photons had mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic.
4. I told this joke to a neutron. It didn't react.
5. A neutrino walks through a bar...
6. A neutron walks into a bar and asks "How much is it for a drink?" The bartender replies, "For you, no charge."
7. 100 kilopascals go into a bar.
8. Gold walks into a bar. The bartender shouts "Ay you! Get out of here!".
9. A hundred scientists walk into a bar. The first one asks for one beer. The second one asks for 1/2 a beer. The third scientist asks for 1/4 a beer. The bartender just pours two beers and says "You guys need to know your limits."
10. Sixteen sodium atoms walk into a bar … followed by Batman.