Okay Roger - listen very carefully, here's what you should do: go into Dixons or wherever and buy a digital movie camera, work out how to use it, then get yourself to Wemyss Bay, hop on the ferry to Rothesay, find the pub where Nigel does his Karaoke bit and when he's on, slink into the audience and surreptitiously record the whole of his performance. Don't let him see you or the camera, because he might try to fill you with beer, or worse, whisky, and remove it from your person. Get the video onto your laptop as quickly as possible, upload it to YouTube, and post it here for our enjoyment.
If you don't think you can manage that today, next Saturday will do.