Christmas competition.

[The Peepmaster]

There once was a wosname from down south somewhere
Who done summat someplace with wotsit
He wosnamed his thingy
Then went and done summat else
And his mate went and done summat too (apparently).

[Rob Baker]

Rob so wins the prize for the biggest Last Line Wasted Opportunity Ever.

Nope, I give up - give us a clue Tarqs.

[Rob Baker]

I'm getting into to this -- results not any good of course -- it gives me something to do in meetings at work. I suppose it's ok to do multiple entries?

When invited to light the advent candle,
Mad Pierre whacked poor Beau with a sandal.
He said with a smirk,
"Peep, you're a berk".
And Beau sobbed "you're a maniacal vandal".

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

Rob so wins the prize for the biggest Last Line Wasted Opportunity Ever.

Nope, I give up - give us a clue Tarqs.

Surely there's something much better you can come up with to rhyme with "fettle" and "settle" than "nettles"? Think 'founder of the feast'!

[Tom]

Gretel.

[Diane CBPFC]

But Egon doesn't rhyme with "fettle" 

[The Peepmaster]

Heavy "Metal"?

[Rob Baker]

OK, for what it's worth, another one..

Said Dennis, "This Christmas, I'm going on strike!"
"Because of that 20 mile hike?",
asked Beau, all concerned.
"No, you still haven't learned,
it's 'cos Christine won't draw me a bike."

[Diane CBPFC]

lol

[Jack]

I'll have a think, but I'm rubbish at these type of things. Every year the Christmas competition involves being creative. Just once I'd like maybe a maths quiz. Or a "Make a game involving Roger stuck in his office" competition.

[Diane CBPFC]

I know what you mean Jack.

However I do have a limerick/beau peep story. I was sprung with being the "jokemaster" at Toastmasters as in - from the Toastmaster of the day, "While you are up there (I was general evaluator that day) you can do your joke" - and looking down seeing my name had been written in over the lady who didn't show who was supposed to do the joke. Well Tom's signature line of
 "I once met a guy from Peru
Whose limericks stopped at line two"
popped into my head and thus the day was saved. 

Anyway I can't do limericks - not that I wouldn't or I shouldn't - just can't. I think I should get a prize for losing 77lbs this year.
There once was a peep named Di
Who lost 77lbs, that's no lie!
She rode on her bike
In shoes made by Nike
And said farewell to noodles and pie.

[Roger Kettle]

Diane, that's absolutely brilliant. Congratulations! You are the official Beau Peep Slimmer Of The Year! Actually, make that Co-Slimmer Of The Year----our own Diamond Lil is looking great after a Summer of calorie-watching. Well done, ladies!

[Tom]

Yes, well done Diane! And well done Diamond Lil!

Diane was the jokemaster that day,
But she was stuck for something to say,
What came to her
Was my signature
Which helped her a bit of the way!

And you so can do limericks! 

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

The thing about Colonel Escargot
Is his mind will undoubtedly fail
When the French fries are down
He will slither to town
Leaving nowt but a silvery trail.

[The Peepmaster]

Diane, that's absolutely brilliant. Congratulations! You are the official Beau Peep Slimmer Of The Year! Actually, make that Co-Slimmer Of The Year----our own Diamond Lil is looking great after a Summer of calorie-watching. Well done, ladies!

Actually, fat birds don't bother me too much; not on forums, anyway.