I'm so glad you're enjoying this exciting new initiative, I feel so validated and not at all like a total tool.
Here's another one.
A football player wanted a game down at the local rec. He packed his boots, turned up to a game in progress and asked the coach if he could get a run.
The coach said "I don't know, are you the chief executive in a country's regional government, such as a province or state?"
The player said "no"
"Then sorry", says the coach, "this isn't some kind of pub competition, this is the........."