Author Topic: Return of the Christmas competition.  (Read 27329 times)

Offline Tarquin Thunderthighs lll

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Re: Return of the Christmas competition.
« Reply #120 on: November 29, 2015, 12:28:40 PM »
He's the funniest cowboy ever invented.
But nobody knows to where he has wented.

They say he has letters from Kitty all scented
He now reads them at night till his sheets get all tented.

Me and Tarks wins !!

:D ;D :D
I apologise, in advance.

Offline Mince

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Re: Return of the Christmas competition.
« Reply #121 on: November 30, 2015, 06:59:35 PM »
Well, okay, I'll extend the deadline until Monday lunchtime and announce the winner that evening.

Does Roger understand the word 'evening'? Come to that, does he understand the word 'Monday'?

Offline Tarquin Thunderthighs lll

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Re: Return of the Christmas competition.
« Reply #122 on: November 30, 2015, 07:30:34 PM »
Patience, man! Scottish evenings have been known to go until morning...several days later.
I apologise, in advance.

Offline Mince

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Re: Return of the Christmas competition.
« Reply #123 on: November 30, 2015, 07:42:38 PM »
I'm just saying he's taking his time getting round to announcing me the winner.

Offline Roger Kettle

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Re: Return of the Christmas competition.
« Reply #124 on: November 30, 2015, 07:55:55 PM »
It's coming...

Offline Mince

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Re: Return of the Christmas competition.
« Reply #125 on: November 30, 2015, 07:59:01 PM »
Just type: "The genius and amazing Mince is the clear winner by lightyears."

Redundant

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Re: Return of the Christmas competition.
« Reply #126 on: November 30, 2015, 08:19:09 PM »
Just type: "The genius and amazing Mince is the clear winner by lightyears."

Lightyears?   Seriously?   You couldn't let me down gently with lightweeks or even lightdays?

Offline Roger Kettle

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Re: Return of the Christmas competition.
« Reply #127 on: November 30, 2015, 08:20:03 PM »
Mince won the prize with a truly brilliant poem----and then I had to take it away from him because he followed it up with a 21-line explanation of why his poem was truly brilliant.
Sandy came VERY close. Anyone who rhymes "sensual" with "pencil" clearly has a gift.
But this year's winner is Redundant with some magnificent poetry which included the poignant image of Horace dying with Kitty's boots on.
Red, I may have your full name and postal details somewhere but send me a PM with them and I'll get your prize off later this week.
Right, that's it. No objections, no recounts, no appeals.
I have spoke.

Offline Mince

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Re: Return of the Christmas competition.
« Reply #128 on: November 30, 2015, 08:22:55 PM »
That's so unfair! Of course I had to explain it to you. It's not my fault you're stupid. Why penalise me for that?

Offline Roger Kettle

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Re: Return of the Christmas competition.
« Reply #129 on: November 30, 2015, 08:38:09 PM »
No, it's not your fault I'm stupid and I'm not penalising you for that.
I'm penalising you for pointing it out.

Offline Mince

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Re: Return of the Christmas competition.
« Reply #130 on: November 30, 2015, 08:44:42 PM »
You must spend most of your days penalising people. Besides, poetry is meant to be about the truth.

Also, I notice that there was no praise whatsoever for your rubbish entry.

I assume Redundant is going to get the whole £50,000.

Redundant

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Re: Return of the Christmas competition.
« Reply #131 on: November 30, 2015, 08:48:50 PM »
I'm filling up...you're sending cash in the post?

Offline Mince

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Re: Return of the Christmas competition.
« Reply #132 on: November 30, 2015, 08:56:08 PM »
Okay, I'll judge it. I've decided that the prize will be £50,000.

He'll probably post it to your neighbour.

Offline Roger Kettle

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Re: Return of the Christmas competition.
« Reply #133 on: November 30, 2015, 09:00:37 PM »
Minus, of course, £49,999.00 for postage.

Redundant

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Re: Return of the Christmas competition.
« Reply #134 on: November 30, 2015, 09:03:26 PM »

He'll probably post it to your neighbour.

My neighbour won a prize too?   This must be the most artistic road in the Isle of Man, ever.   I feel a poem coming on...no, it's just wind.