Return of the Christmas competition.

[Mince]

But then you're the first person ever to write a poem that included the word "sunset", aren't you?

No, but I was the one before you.

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

Ah, but I wrote 'Ode To An Auchtermuchty Sunset' for my A-level English exam in 1976.

[Sandy Buttcheeks]

I can visualise Mince googling Auchtermuchty !!

 

[Roger Kettle]

"Googling Auchtermuchty" is as poetic as the English language will ever be.

[Sandy Buttcheeks]

Michty Michty, Auchtermuchty
A place in Scotland, theres ne'er enough ae

 

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

Michty Michty, Auchtermuchty
A place in Scotland, theres ne'er enough ae

 

[sits back and waits for Mincey to pick the bones out of that] 

[Mince]

[sits back and waits for Mincey to pick the bones out of that] 

Has he been drinking again?

[Mince]

I'm still waiting for an entry by Sandy that actually has something to do with Horace. 

[Sandy Buttcheeks]

Oh great chieftain, the man they call Horace,
I heard that your star sign, just might be Taurus
Which means that your reliable, stubborn and sensual
I would have wrote more, but I just broke my pencil.

Ta daa

[Mince]

COMPETITION WORDING: The Christmas competition for this year (and the idea is from my father, Peter) is to write a short poem about how A Man Called Horace should have ended.

HOW SANDY READ IT: The Christmas competition for this year (and the idea is from my father, Peter) is to write down some words, one of which has to be "Horace", that rhyme badly, completely avoid any mention of how A Man Called Horace should have ended or indeed anything about the strip.

If you change the word "Horace" to "Superman", no one would have the slightest clue that this was about A Man Called Horace. And how is Horace a chieftain? And don't even get me started on "your".

Roger, disqualify him for being useless. 

[Roger Kettle]

"Chieftain" is being used as a parody of a very famous Robert Burns poem.
"Your" is wrong.
I love it!

[Mince]

Great chieftain o the puddin'-race!

Or in Sandy's case, pudding brain. Anyway, how do you know he was referring to Burn's poem? Knowing Sandy, it was a reference to the Chieftain tank after a bottle of Chieftain's malt whiskey.

[Roger Kettle]

You could be right.

[Mince]

Well, shouldn't he be disqualified just on the off-chance?

[Sandy Buttcheeks]

Oh yeah, how very mature. Disqualify the only real bard on the board!

Heathen.