Return of the Christmas competition.

[Mince]

I see you nicked my copyrighted "sunset" idea.

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

Good grief - I'm mortified! You think I actually read your posts?

I've just checked back. You call that a rhyme? 

[Mince]

This is coming from someone who doesn't know how to use the verb "bilk".

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

I take no lessons from someone who doesn't know that "bilk" is also a noun.

[Mince]

Yes, but it's a concrete noun, as in trickster, scammer, swindler.

So your line could read:

The loss of our Horace, a source of great trickster

Or:

The loss of our Horace, a source of great scammer

I believe you were flailing clumsily for the abstract noun, only to discover not only that it doesn't exist (bilkery?) but also that it doesn't rhyme with ilk, except perhaps in one of Acker's songs.

[Mince]

Roger, I think Tarquin's entry should be disqualified because his poem rhymes without making sense he's a complete girl's blouse.

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

Yes, but it's a concrete noun, as in trickster, scammer, swindler.

So your line could read:

The loss of our Horace, a source of great trickster

Or:

The loss of our Horace, a source of great scammer

I believe you were flailing clumsily for the abstract noun, only to discover not only that it doesn't exist (bilkery?) but also that it doesn't rhyme with ilk, except perhaps in one of Acker's songs.

It also means deceit. Get it now? We were never told - it was hidden from us. Hence the competition.

You're just jealous I managed to include a rare gem like "bilk", you malagrugrous jollux, you.

[Mince]

It also means deceit.

And it says this in your Dictionary of Words Redefined to Rhyme? What complete acker!

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

After all those nice things I said about you, and I haven't even received the cheque yet... 

[Sandy Buttcheeks]

Deceipt...dechair...desofa?

Who cares? It's all about decomfort.

[Mince]

After all those nice things I said about you, and I haven't even received the cheque yet... 

But that is a countable noun (a deceit), not an uncountable noun (some deceit), which is what you are claiming. I think Roger should adjudicate here, since he is the referee. So Roger, isn't source of great bilk using bilk as an uncountable noun? I'm right, aren't I? I think he should be told off and disqualified for cheating, and for nicking my sunset idea.

[Sandy Buttcheeks]

After all those nice things I said about you, and I haven't even received the cheque yet... 

I think Roger should adjudicate here

That's an outrageous request. Dirty Mince!

 

[Mince]

That's an outrageous request. Dirty Mince!

Are you saying Roger lacks the brains to adjudicate?

[Tarquin Thunderthighs lll]

After all those nice things I said about you, and I haven't even received the cheque yet... 

But that is a countable noun (a deceit), not an uncountable noun (some deceit), which is what you are claiming. I think Roger should adjudicate here, since he is the referee. So Roger, isn't source of great bilk using bilk as an uncountable noun? I'm right, aren't I? I think he should be told off and disqualified for cheating, and for nicking my sunset idea.

It's poetry. Poetic licence. Creative writing. Artistic interpretation, employing clever wordplay to engage in the subtleties of capricious whimsy, you f****** a*******!

But then you're the first person ever to write a poem that included the word "sunset", aren't you?

[Sandy Buttcheeks]

Surely not.
There's far to many words that rhyme with sunset...

There's..